Dear Zhann, never believe that the darkness you see now will always be because the sun will shine again and this moment in time will be hard to remember. I've been there too and at this time last year I thought my life was over, after 33 years of diabetes I finally got the long dreaded complications of the disese, ie. heart disease, kidney disease and nerve damage, not only one type of nerve damage though, I was greedy and got all 3 types. 8) But look I'm still around and there's no getting rid of me, and I feel I've come a long way in the past year and a lot of that comes from being part of this forum and knowing all the lovely people here who make me laugh and think. Too many "ands" in that last paragraph. lol 8) If you need to talk you know we're all here to listen and if you don't want to go public, like Ang said, IM me and we can cheer each other up. Be well Zhann, take everything that life flings at you with a pinch of salt, and remember that you are a wonderful human being with a lot of talent and a big heart. big hug 8) Catlin