ROTFLMAO! Mine is: Only use the words 'yes Dear' when the missus is talking at you......... Bark like a dog when walking round the supermarket.....(done this, it's hysterical!)

Available on Amazon for the Kindle E-Reader

All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster

And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...