Once again, many thanks for your condolences.

I've just got back from the ceremony of "interring the ashes" (mother was cremated a week ago). Such a small remnant of a vibrant woman...

I'm now going to make some possibly contraversial staements, but they're true...

I'm not a very emotional person.
I'm an atheist.
I found the ceremonies (the pre-cremation one and the interment later) moving in a small way but I got put off by all the (undoubtedly well-intentioned but to my mind unsupported) statements regarding "in the after-life". I don't believe in it, and cannot be convinced.

I will remember mother, with great affection. But she is gone and that is that. Sad, but true.

To me, to maintain (as the vicar did in the cermonies) that she is "still alive, but somewhere else" seems rather condescending. It was hard attending these ceremonies, but I had to do it to give support to the rest of the family - I may be an atheist, but I know my duty.

I'm almost over my mourning now. I know that I'll have "flashbacks" for the next few years, but eventually that'll fade. Like it did for my father, many years ago.

But I still very much appreciate the warm support that's been given by this forum, whether from a theological perspective or from a purely humanitarian one. Sympathy is non-demoninational (in fact it's non-religious) - it's just a very human and welcome attitude.

Many thanks again,
Diolma