Well.........it's well produced and very clean, but my first thought was the bass line needs to be more pronounced. It just doesn't 'thump' along enough.

Then I realised that I was hearing this 'RAP' track and expecting some big black guy (no offense to big black guys) to start rapping about how great he was and how much love he was gonna give his girl if she...etc......

My only real techical/musical suggestion though is that when you introduce a new phrase bring it up a bit more in the mix before fading it down when the next phrase comes along.

I hope this helps, but it really isn't my kind of music.

Available on Amazon for the Kindle E-Reader

All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster

And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...