>> I wonder how much these stats contribute to the general (secular) antipathy to same sex marriages, i.e., feelings that the institution of marriage is already under assault?

If it's under assault, it's from within, not without. Gays and lesbians arent the problem with the failure rate of heterosexual marriages. We're simply a convenient scapegoat for folks who dont want to deal with their own failings and need to find someone else to blame so they can be "victims" and shove their own faults onto anyone else they can. Not saying we're blameless when it comes to such a tactic, but when it comes to a 62% divorce rate, sorry, I doubt we have anywhere near that much sway. If we did, gay marriage would have been a fait accompli a long time ago. :)

>> 'Don't ask don't tell' is one thing but S/S marriage grants a social legitamacy to the gay/lesbian lifestyle that I don't think many hetero's are comfortable with.

Sorry, no sympathy there. Our history has been littered with someone's need to feel superior to someone else, which is why this nation of freedom and liberty took almost two centuries to fully recognize blacks as participating citizens and one hundred and fifty years to grant women the right to live as something more than property exchanged in the legal rites of marriage. We have also systematically jerked around the Natives, the Irish, the Jews, the Japanese-Americans, and -- well, no surprise here -- the gays... all in our searching need to be superior.

So pardon me if I'm not interested in knowing what other people's "comfort level" might be. That's irrelevant, just as I doubt they lose sleep at night worrying what I might think of them.

>> That's one of the most compelling reasons for supporting S/S marriage that I've ever heard

And it's a pity that the reason even has to exist in the first place. But I appreciate your kind thoughts. It's been over two decades, and I still miss him, a lot. Were he still alive, I'm sure by now we'd be on our way to California, even at our somewhat advanced ages. At least, I can console myself with the thought. :)

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