this is some seriously good info guys

i did some further testing

bryce 6.1 sees it just fine, but i couldn't manipulate the mesh @ all, i tried ungrouping and regrouping and it just wouldn't really allow for anything beyond transition or posing (rotate, translate, scale). I remember when i had bryce 3 back in the day and it had modeling capabilities, did they hide that or get rid of it? (similiar to truespace, grab a vertex or polygon and drag it)
It really burned my biscuits that it worked(rendered), and im not real sure why. I did learn the difference between normal, positive and negative, so i did learn something

it also appeared fine in dazstudio, but i can't stand that program, and refuse to use it.

in carrara 5 pro however, the missing polygons were there but the mesh was coloured light blue, where the missing polygons were was dark blue. It had a little tick mark under 'smart'. I tried exporting it from here about 5-6 times, doing a mathmatical elimination of variables based on the export options. None worked.

I haven't tried vue 6 pro yet, i expect it would b similar to bryce. i had a tank (mobloc) that had the issue of exploding, vue saw it fine, renderend it fine but poser loaded it all jacked up.

i also use propview, so i can see the mesh, and all the negative i experienced in poser was visible in propview. which furthers the model is built in a wanky way, and not simply one piece of software with a weak 3ds importer, or the operator's ignorance on the importance and relevance over a half dozen check marks involving the import dialog, ;-)
Granted, my ignorance has a big part in it, but that's why we learn

My next hope is maybe a demo of 3dsmax and it allowing me to export these. Which I think I have done before years ago. When yer downloading freebies and not paying attention, and ya have a handful of max files with cool names. The curiosity is simply too much...

Thank u all fer the input thus far and any who have any other insight, it is massively appreciated.
I also noticed a program called polytrans (400.00 US) which solidified that I'm not alone, but a converter in that price range is way out there as a 'not gonna happen'. I was mad enough to drop 20 bux if necessary, but that's all the convenience is worth. Learning this will be worth way more

Sort of off topic question, what vid cards are good nowadays? My roomate ordered a new system (amd 6000+/ 2gigz ram) but she left the integrated video (geforce 7050pv; nvidia 630a) as she isn't a 3d freak like me. The board has a pciEx16 slot. And based on just the little I knew (sys requirments for the software I have) I was thinking a geforce 9300gts (512mb ram). Am I going the wrong way?