Yikes!  I'M an aunt!

Sheesh.  This gets weirder by the minute.

Okay you guys, I've done everything Ronnie and Piet suggested (including using a funnel ... thanks, RJ!) and everything everyone else said that I could remember, and this is what I've come up with.  Please don't judge me too harshly on setup!  I wanted to throw together severall different sorts of textures to see what happened.  This is what happened! 

All I did in postwork was an unsharp mask, a compositional crop, and I cloned out a bunch of white lint on my black fabric background.  (Truth in advertising, here!)

Clearly, I still have a LOT to learn!!!

Thanks, everybody!

This is my third shot.

"If your pictures aren't good enough, you're not close enough."  ...  Robert Capa