Arthur Dent and yes, the question was flawed...or was that the answer?

I think the real answer is to read all the Hitchikers' books....but avoid cricket.

As for Red Dwarf, I got bored with it after the first series.

Available on Amazon for the Kindle E-Reader

All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster

And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...