"What did I do wrong with the lacrimal/sclera bit?"

Had to fix that on a character just tonight. The skin texture was bright scary pink for some reason.. added some color to the diffuse setting (in my case  RGB 124,114,109 did the trick) and the gloss on it was just as shiny as yours. Try changing the color to a mid gray rather than white, make the glossiness about 98 (for a sharp highlight rather than a broad gloss). I tend to have trouble getting the scalera to look right for some reason. I think some textures used are darker than the normal human eye really is (be sure you used glossy plastic on it by the way) and if it looks to dark or gray you can lower the diffused texture a little bit to brighten it up some.

Oh and we have some free Studio stuff on the site as well if you do go look at the tutorial link Katanas gave you.

Did you do anything other than raytraced shadows that might have added to the render time? Raytraced reflections anywhere or sub surface scattering on her skin maybe? 

I think most people who share what they make list it in the freebies here, at 3dCommune and so forth. You may want to visit some of the smaller brokerages and sign up for newsletters so you know when they are giving things away as well.

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