Quote - The sermon this morning: Jesus Walks on the Water.The sermon tonight: Searching for Jesus.

Angels with water wings needed. :)

Quote - For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

Never thought about a nursery.  Wonder why . . .

Quote - Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

This must be why. :p

Quote - The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

This evening at 7pm there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

I would think these go together.

Quote - Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7pm. Please use the back door.

Weight Watchers will meet at 7pm at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

As do these.

Quote - The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan last Sunday: "Hello.  After reading your brief profile, . . . Signed Jeanzz".