cooking? took me about a month to go from boiled egg to full roast dinner for six with all the trimmings. including bread making, cakes, etc. I thank Alton Brown for some of that... the rest was pure experimenting a patience. I enjoy cooking a great deal.

I think part of the material room problem is, if I can put this into words.. I don't have the math. at school, we had sixth maths groups, 1 being top, six being special needs. I was inm 5.

so I have no maths to speak of... kind of. I can do algerbra in my head. the teacher would show us a problem on the board and I'd get into trouble for just writing the answer. he wanted to see the working out. ok it was simple puzzles, but I never did any working out. I just saw the answer. if I worked it out, I'd get it wrong everytime.

so I was marked down and left school with a substandard maths education. now I see BB's and others shaders posted.

if this makes sense, I can read the music. but I can't read the notes. I can follow what the shader does. but, I don't how it does it. just knowing the nodes won't help here I think.. (I'm figuring this out here as I write it. I'm actually putting in public what I've hidden from me as well).. I think I'd have to go back to school and start over. gah someone just shoot me.