Ok I think I am getting somewhere!

I'm making two hair props. One has the lower layer, that starts at ear level and goes down. The thick strands are "sown" together, creating more like a loose cap than strands, giving the hair completeness.  Then I am making another prop on top of it that starts from the parting on top of the head. This will collide with V4 and the underlaying prop. I haven't added any soft decorated strands yet, but I think it could work!

The clothroom likes separate props layered on each other much better than self collision, probably for obvious reasons, since the self collision will have a harder time deciding what goes on top. 2, or even 3 separate props and the top one having soft decorated groups for styling and thickness really could be something. They are layering as they should. Now it's just a matter of refining everything and getting it right. 

MD really is nice for making those strips! They are automatically made as hex triangles, and the strip comes unwrapped straight, easy to texture. They just need to be organized a bit. The screenshot shows with and without test texture, and no transmaps.