Well, like you said, we're not allowed to be happy.

 

Acquired 4.6 zb and retopo tool works miracles, however, it also eats the uv maps and any grouping you might have on the model.

So, I tried moving the panels away from each other in max, then going in for the retopo, but then the edges get lost or dulled and when you put the model back together in max there are gaps on what used to be seams.  No luck there.

This needs to be the next milestone...retaining uv.