You are not an idiot.  The "programmers" at DAZ quite frankly aren't very good.  When DAZ was using installers, initializing V4 (and M4, K4) was part of the install process.  Now that they use zips, it is up to the end-users to figure it out.

The file you need to look for is in the !DAZ folder.  DzCreateExPFiles-V4  Double-click on it and then reload V4 into the scene.  At this point, the morphs should be working.

If it doesn't work, let me know.