Quote - Just a quick note about perspective: changing focal length does not change perspective (only the angle of view), you must move the camera. To get the exaggerated effect you want you must move the camera very close to the subject and use a very wide angle of view (set focal length to 16mm or thereabouts), like you'd do with a real camera.

Yes and there is a parameter dial called perspective that both changes camera position and focal length at the same time. OP said he tried that and it did nothing.

Quote - i've fiddled with the perspective and focal length sliders in the camera parameters box

I don't believe it was done to the correct camera. It is super obvious that it does something when you actually do it to the camera you're looking through. 

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Renderosity forum reply notifications are wonky. If I read a follow-up in a thread, but I don't myself reply, then notifications no longer happen AT ALL on that thread. So if I seem to be ignoring a question, that's why. (Updated September 23, 2019)