I wish you the best future. I understand this and have other friends who are at this same point of thinking. I think with everything, sometimes either stepping away, or changing creative outlets can be helpful. There was a time when I wrote and had stories that had been in consideration for a tv project, as well as a story that got some praise and feedback from George R. Martin (he's amazingly nice btw). It was early in his career. At the time, I just lost the drive to continue writing and moved into dabbling into 3d art. I never thought myself good at any of these (always considered myself at hobby levels at best) but looking back, there was a time when I held contracts in my hand (before the show got cancelled about a week later... lol ).

The dust settled, thinking "what a fine home, at least for now" not realizing that doom would soon be coming in the form of a vacuum cleaner.