For those of you who can't - or won't - visit the link, here is a quick summary:

First thing is, you need to roll up the left leg of your jeans/pants/trousers, or, if you're wearing tights/stockings/pantyhose, cut off the left leg, then put your left foot in a bowl of custard.

Make sure you are facing north, holding a freshly plucked chicken in your right hand. Vegans can substitute an artichoke, or at a pinch, kohlrabi.

Using only the index finger of your right hand, initiate the download and follow all the prompts, even if they don't apply to your system.

After 30 minutes, sprinkle your keyboard and monitor - but absolutely not - your computer with 4 ounces of rock salt. If you have a render farm, use ground black pepper, rather than salt.

Wait for sunrise.

At sunrise, ensure you're naked, standing outside your front door, painted head to toe in woad. This won't do anything much but at least you'll have a few hours of amusement explaining to the local law enforcement, while your new Poser installation updates.

Finally, smear unsalted butter all over your desk and hop around your room on one foot. Any foot will do. Make sure you hop for at least 20 minutes, but no more than 23.

That should take care of everything.

Coppula eam se non posit acceptera jocularum.

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