WARNING: DO NOT USE THE BENDY STRAW IN FREE STUFF FOR PEA-SHOOTING ...

The bendy straw in Free Stuff is not certified for pea-shooting activities; users have reported misfires, hangfires, and weapon-jams at the bendy part. We can not take legal responsibility for any misuse of this product.

If your pea should jam, set the bendy straw down gently on a flat surface and seek cover immediately. Do not attempt to extract the pea yourself; do not look directly into the barrel of the bendy straw. Notify your local HazMat unit or bomb squadron for professional dismantling.

This has been a public service announcement by Little_Dragon Fun Stuff Ltd., a division of Psycho Industries. We now return you to your regularly scheduled rant against injustice.