Yes, the number of frames makes a big difference. The cloth is an approximation to a physical situation. Generally, people don't take 1/30second to go from standing to sitting. Better to make it a realistic time (or even longer, because simulations generally don't like fast-moving objects).

If you send me/upload the object, I can take a look at it.

Does your mesh have any very small or long/thin triangles? That can cause problems.

You can try clothfx (www.turbosquid.com).

The problem is that your cloth is not "flattenable". In the real world, clothes are made from flat pieces of fabric. As a crude example, suppose you modeled a hemisphere in your favotire 3d app. Now, if you try to flatten it with a cloth simulator, it won't work, because it is inherently non-flat. The only way to flatten such a thing is to changed the triangle edge lengths appropriately, or to "cut" it strategically. That is why real clothes have darts. Of course, this doesn't really solve your problem, but it may lead you to a solution.

Time (in seconds) taken for last simulation step.

Looks like a bug. Send the file to curious labs.

If you have 3ds max, Use GarmentMaker (part of Stitch from www.digimation.com).

It's not that complicated. 1. Pose your figure 2. Load the cloth prop (which has to fit the "neutral" pose) 3. Create Simulation, add body to collisions (make sure "start draping from zero pose" is checked). 4. Bring up "Simulation Settings" dialog 5. Set drape frames to 20 or something 6. Click "Calculate Drape". 7. The figure will do a gradual morph from neutral pose to your pose over 20 frames (or whatever you set), moving the cloth with it.

Try increasing the range of the wind force (i.e. increase its volume of infuence). Any cloth outside the "cone" is unaffected.