Its been a while since we had a good old-fashioned member participation thread, so heres one. Each year various organizations give out awards for excellence in movies, music, business, politics, books, etc., seemingly everything. But what about the other end of the spectrum, the bad, the useless, the just plain awful. The annoying, the banal, the stupidwell, you get the idea. So, I have created the Moony Awards, and now you can give them to those people and things that are most deserving. First, a few ground rules: Rule 1: Choose from one to three recipients for the awards. Recipients can be recent or all-time gawd-awful people or things. You can give an explanation as to why your choices should receive the award, but please keep it brief. Rule 2: The awards can not be given to Renderosity, its admins, or any of the mods. It also cannot be given to Corel: this has been adequately addressed here already and doesnt need the overkill. :^) Rule 3: No one is to maltreat any of the others in any wayif theres anybody watching. The awards can not be given to any of your fellow members. Rule 4. Since someone is bound to hate something you love, please dont argue with someone elses choices. If you feel you must respond negatively to someones choices, do so in an IM. No public displays, please. Rule 5. There is no Rule 5. Rule 6. No poofters. OK, heres mine: 1. Reality TV. Are we really this hard up for entertainment? 2. Adam Sandler. I just dont think hes funny. At all. Ever. 3. Celine Dion. I cant stand her voice, Im not even sure why.

This is not my "second childhood". I'm not finished with the first one yet.

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

"I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather....not screaming in terror like the passengers on his bus." - Jack Handy

1. George Bush. Who else calls terrorists 'folks'? 2. Gerry Springer. Who else treats people with such condescending contempt? 3. Any 'rap' artiste(?). Who else can make a living talking the biggest load of bo****ks you ever heard? Nice idea Tjohn, who's Adam Sandler? Dennis

Attached Link: http://www.adamsandler.com/

Dennis: Follow this link at your own risk. :^)

This is not my "second childhood". I'm not finished with the first one yet.

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

"I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather....not screaming in terror like the passengers on his bus." - Jack Handy

Thanks Tjohn, I'm none the wiser although 'she who must be obeyed' sais she's seen two of his films so he must be 'somebody'. Me, I prefer the mutt with the stupid name! Dennis

People who use the word "your" when they really meant to say " you're "......... People who use foul language when Ladies or children are present..... People who pick their nose in the company of others...

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All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster

And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...

"Any 'rap' artiste" Now way! Rappers are cool!

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1. People that misuse the words: like,went, & go/goes. 2. Litterbugs. They're the epitomy of laziness! 3. Car salesmen. If you're innocent/naive they exploit you, if you're intelligent/inuitive it's insulting. Great Trophy tjohn!!

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lol very funny TJohn (shame on you Celine Dion is one of my fav shhhhhh dont tell anyone) Lets see......mine would be.... rips open the envelope ....and the winners are 1.Ben and Jen -- do we really give a rip if they get married or not?? 2. Infomercials -- for all that have been in one, wrote one, directed one, and a special extra mooney award for the butthead that controls the sound that blasts thru the tv in the middle of the night...I'm sleeping, I dont care if I'm fat, wrinkled, got zits, sold a gazzilion dodads and now I'm a millionare too, BUT WAIT there is more....I don't need a new juicer, or a "set it and forget it" countertop cooker dealy, or a bowflex, or a exersize video, or vitamins that up my sexual energy level, or pills guaranteed to make me loose 100lbs in a month, or a thighmaster, or a new bed that adjust to my comfort level...list goes on and on 3. goes to all the "tappers, thumpers, paper wrinklers, hummers, loose change jinglers, and other buggin the heck outta me noise makers out there. lol ty I feel better now thats off my chest, Teri R

1. People who turn slowly onto a different road or driveway and have no need to. JUST TURN THE DAMN CAR, IT'S NOT GOING TO FLIP OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2. People who don't use their turn signal when they turn. WHAT, WAS THAT MODEL NOT EQUIPPED WITH SIGNALS?!? 3. Red light cameras. A cash cow for any city that has the dough to spend on them. I've never been caught and don't plan to, but I still think it's ridiculous. Runner Up: Overpaid actors/actresses in the movie industry. Don't even begin to tell me athletes are overpaid, the job they do is typically far more strenuous than the 6-weeks-maybe job that actors gotta do and get paid tons for. $20 Million for one movie? Please...and don't don't show me those advertisements on tv that attempt to crack down on movie piracy by having people go, "How will I pay for school?" or "How will I get my benefits?" I know how, pay your leading actors a little less and we'll be all happy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~:-| Burning up now............... MD

Oh yeah...Celine Dion too. But I guess she can fit in my runner-up category. The no-talent _______________. MD

Hey Rayraz I thought the rules of these awards allowed nominations without negative responses from Forum members. And we all know why there are so many rappers - anybody can do it!! Yo man Dennis

1. To Yasser Arafat and Arik Sharon for making my life unsafe. 2. To all our parlement members for getting anohter payrise, while the rest of the country is struggling to survive, people commit suicide because they can not support their families anymore, hospitals close, many live below the poverty line. 3. To Parents who neglect their children, forget them in their cars or leave them there while shopping. This week a couple with 12 kids forgot their 6 year old in the car and didn't notice she was missing for 16 hours!!! They didn't notice she was not in her bed at night. The older sister had to take her to kindergarten in the morning, but she never did. The next day the mother call the kindergarten why the girl did not arrived home and the teacher said she didn't show up in the morning! Finally they found her dead in the car where they had locked her in. I am so mad about this!!!!!

My gallery @ Renderosity

1. people who feel like they have to buy abercrombie and whatever its called. why would you spendd 60$$ on a pair of freaking socks? I think you have to make down-payments on their shirts and stuff... 2.the big news programs and how they try to tie terroism and 9/11 into every even that has occured since 2001. even ben and jens wedding... 3.IM with maddog on the overpaid actors and actresses--w/ the money they spend on freakin houses for their pets (yes, it happens) we could have saved a few thousand kids lives in another country. ps. this is a great idea john:))

I've got a little list, I've got a little list, and they never would be missed..;)

I wish I'd said that.. The Staircase Wit

anahl nathrak uth vas betude doth yel dyenvey..;)

1. George Bush: Who claims "we don't speak mexican here" you dumbass mexican's not even a friggin language! 2. Overpaid Professional sports players (that's just nuts...I don't get it personally) 3. The man who wrote my physics book with the idea that vectors should be used in matricies....

People who put jars/bottles back in the fridge with the cap just barely on. They either go flat or bust when you drop them because you grab by the lid. Any politician who promises if elected they will cut costs. From the register of deeds and dog catcher on up to the mayor promise this. They don't control the budget. The only way they can cut costs is by not making copies or not feeding the animals (ie not doing their jobs). Any entertainer that made millions by bitching about how badly life has treated them. I'm tired of seeing Letterman play the professional cynic. I'm sick of rappers in Bel Air gated communities bitching about Drivebys in the "hood".

"anybody can do it!!" Have you ever tried a freestyle battle? :)

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sorry for arguing btw. I'll shut up now :)

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'tried a freestyle battle', I had to search Google to find out what it meant!! But it seems there is Freestyle Forums so in for a penny in for pound...... now listen up closely as i start this off// y'all have to be quiet so no you can't cough// i ain't looking for trouble i ain't been doing this long// but if you cause sht i'll know you'll be in the wrong// i don't care if you're a f**d up wigger singing a shtty song// or whether you're a slutty bitch in a thong// you're best going away and getting wrecked// zero rythem, zero talent, zero respect// i'm a nightmare giving you cataplatic attacks// if this was a battle you've lost, and thats a fact// good style is one thing your vocal coards lack// ma voice box is super lyrical to the max// keep your little disses away from ma face// or i'll have to be kicking you back to outta space// i'm gonna end this by blowing you outta ma mouth like smoke// i'll give you some advice which is just to choke!! nice, aren't they, rappers!!! Dennis

Points made, rappers are great/they suck, let's move onward and upward, thanks, 'nuff said. :^)

This is not my "second childhood". I'm not finished with the first one yet.

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

"I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather....not screaming in terror like the passengers on his bus." - Jack Handy

lol, I hate rap too... But that's just me. It is not melodic at all, which is what I like (to listen to music...)

People who ask for your opinion/advice/ answer to a question, only to ignore it... ask someone else get the same response and go on and on how smart that person is. Radio stations who keep talking about how they don't talk but play music... If they'd just shut up about how they don't talk all the time they could play more music.Or when they stop to tell you you're in the middle of 10 in row... I'm not now you mental midget as you just broke it up with your oh so cool attitude filled voice. (Like there's much worth listening to anyway...) People who want to sue for anything... Oh no I got fat cause Mcdonalds food is too fatening, and cheap to supersize it... Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Blaming all children who become killers on video games/music/movies. Everyone knows it's what the gov't is putting in the water. :)

oh one more-----everybody raise your hand if you agree... MTV SUCKS the last time they played a freaking music video was in 97. (they never were that great) ive "boycotted" it for the past couple of years--never watch it.

1. People who say the word Got in a sentence. It makes you sound like you're from Arkansas and you're married to your cousin. Not to mention the mental picture of six toothless kids on the pourch playing the banjo. 2. White kids from the suburbs who think there black. BTW, most rap music is bought by them. 3. Rich teens with nice cars that have the trunk filled with bass speakers. Even the fillings in your teeth get rattled. I could go on, but I'll go now..........

((quietly confesses to having actually recorded several rap singles waaaay back in the day)) 1. Bill Clinton, poor deluded sod, the internet bubble was during his watch, no wonder, it was all about image without substance. 2. People who claim "tolerance" as their buzzword but readily attack based on stereotypes and slam others who hold strong beliefs. 3. Anyone in authority who blends a mixed cocktail of arrogance ans stupidity. GAAH!!! Ok, enough for now...but having once been labled a rapper perhaps my opinion doesn't count :)

Just to clear up what a freestyle battle (not to make any points about rap being good or bad); A freestyle battle is when 2 (or more) rappers need to improvise a rap to take the other one down or just prove they're the better rapper. The rapper that displays the best lyrical skills by thinking up the best metaphores, rithms, word-play, using qualities and previous lyrics of the opponent to his/her own benefit etc. is the winner and earns the respect of his fellow rappers and the crowd. These lyrics are to be thought up in real time. They just throw a beat at you and you need to rap on it. The freestyle that you posted isn't of really high lyrical standard. That one seems to be just about using as much rotten language as possible. Wich I personally do not think is cool at all. And some rappers are like that, using dirty language all the time. But the best rappers put some true meaning in their lyrics. We have a dutch rapper here called 'Brainpower' and his lyrics go very deep some times and he doesn't need to use countless harsh words per second to be 'dope'. Okay people, that's about it. I'll let everyone make up his/her mind on the matter and won't comment on it no more.

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1. People who can't drive, but still use a car. 2. Spoiled people who just can't take a 'no'. 3. People who bump into you because they're trying to get through a crowd fast and then start yelling at you for not moving out of their way.

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1)Presedents Bush, (both), for having minimal intelligence and being the most powerful and dangerous man/men on the planet............"lets bomb Iraq so I can show my daddy how good I am". (sorry but the guy and his father scare me) 2)All media, news paper, tv news, etc. for lying, making something out of nothing to get a story, for interfering and wrecking peoples lives, and for just being nasty. (ie. causing the suicide of Dr Kelly in the UK) 3)All polititians, for lying, cheating, abusing power, not listening to the opinions of those who voted for them, for taking us to war, for doing things internationally which turn other nationalities against us even though we don't agree with their policies, I could go on but I'll stop here so I can cool down. That's my list and I hope that all these people are the first against the wall come the revolution. 8) Catlin

1...Tony Blair, for pretending to be a labour politician. He is also famous for being a wannabee George Bush, who can't make a decision without consulting him, but refuses to consult the british public about major decisions like the . 2...Ken Livingstone for trying to make it impossible for people to live and work in London unless they are amongst the 10% top earners in the UK. He charges you to drive in London, and then puts up public transport fares with no improvement to service. 3...Gordon Brown for getting his sums wrong, so now everyone in the UK has to pay crippling community charges to fund his mistake.

The greatest part of wisdom is learning to develop  the ineffable genius of extracting the "neither here nor there" out of any situation...."

Also, tjohn, I think this is a great award and has been sorely needed. 8)

1. Virus writers (received about 1500 pieces of virus email since the day before yesterday) 2) Spammers (I don't give a flying ffffffffig about Viagra, Nigerian National Bank, penis growth pills or especially whatever those idjits offer in Chinese and Korean) 3) Idiots of any colour, faith and nationality. Especially those who think that because they have a bigger car they can do whatever they please on the road. Especially those who behave in the "me, me, me" way. "Death to vermin." Well, that's a quote from an SF book. :-) Dennis, not all rappers are created equal. Take Eminem, for instance. His songs are stories, good stories. Listen to "Stan" or "Real Slim Shady" or "Lose Yourself". Listen to the story about a deluded fan in "Stan", to the self-ironizing in "Real Slim Shady", to the need to escape, to the sheer power of music in "Lose Yourself". Whoa. And I'm a fan of harder kinds of music. :-)

-- erlik

MTV died when Ray Cokes left!!! My personal hit list with people whom not only deserves the award, but also people i hope gets a painful,(and very, very slow) death: 1. People who torture or kill animals for fun. 2. Pedophiles 3. Swedish crap music producers. The ones that creates that Britney Spears type of crap. Great idea Tjohn!

Rudolf Herczog
Digital Artist
www.rochr.com

People that devout their lives to religion (all religions) hypocrites who tell me that they are here to save me. People that stop/delay scientific progress through arguments like youre playing GOD. People that mask/make excuses/lie and point out events to cover-up their own greed and stupidity. People that cant think for themselves.

This could run and run........... 4) The BBC...yup, all of it........mainly for putting on sub-standard sport events at every opportunity and for no good reason. 5) Tony Blair and his mate Rhodri Morgan...for lying to us about the how the Petrol Protests were killing people. 6) My Mother-in-Law..for hating me for 30 thirty years...

Available on Amazon for the Kindle E-Reader

All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster

And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...

The laws that take away my right to dicsipline my children and then complains that I can't control them!! The laws demand I pay $25.00 a day to have my child put in Juvenile Detention for assaulting me, and then charge me for HER court appointed lawyer!!! The police who answer the calls when a child assaults their parents, then tell the parents the child really respects them deep down inside!

1. If you live in this country and need a sign to tell you that coffee is hot...PUT A HELMET ON. 2. "The dolphins are getting caught in the tuna nets, the dolphins are getting caught in the tuna nets!" What about the TUNA getting caught in the tuna nets? They're not crazy about it. "Well yeah, but dolphins are the smartest non-human mammal." If dolphins are so smart, tell them to GO AROUND. Stupid animal rights activists. You don't see any fish activists, guys chaining themselves to docks, "be kind to carp!" Why not? Fish are ugly. And it's not often you see any bug activists. Why? They're ugly. And stupid. You never hit a bug from behind, they are never running away. They have no concept for glass, all they see is your fat head coming at them at 80 miles an hour, they're goin "Come on, you swelled head freak, i'm not backin down. BRING IT splat" They're up in heaven, "How'd you die?" "Well, i don't know, i was flying down the road and i just...blew up." It's crazy. 3. People who get the idea that self esteem is a good thing..."Let's not make little Jimmy tie his shoes, let's slap some velcro on there instead, that way he'll have good self esteem!" "What, you're fat? It's not your fault, let's sue McDonalds!" STOP EATING SO DAMN MUCH.

1. people who use "I could care less".. it is "I could NOT care less" 2) laywers .. they have their fingers in everything, time to chop them off (see slakkers post #3) 3) mortuaries/morticians, they have you at a vunerable time and put the screws to you to over spend question to tjohn.. in regards to #6, what is a poofter ?

"What is a poofter ?" I was wondering about that myself :)

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Anybody like to enlighten Unclebob and Rayraz, I had better not!! Dennis

Oh I just remembered one more, and this may seem stupid but - People who take advantage of situations based on their race. IE the whole indian casino deal (wtf? does anyone understand that?) there are various others that I won't go into detail on. But basically, all this P.C. (politically correct, it's even NON PC to say politically correct!!! did you know that?) bs, In my town the caucasians are the minority, I walk out regularly and get called "cracker" etc etc etc.. It doesn't bother me, but what does is that it's ok because I'm caucasian and therefore not protected by any racial intollerance acts. 3 days ago a man was walking down the street, killed another man and it was called murder, nobody even knows why he killed him, the defendent had no reason...The defendent was also non caucasion/the victim was. 3 weeks ago a man was threatened and had a knife pulled on him (this was all caught on tape in a subway btw) the man, furious, beat the mugger down and kicked him, he was later charged with assault and racial intollerance, because the man who pulled the knife was of a non caucasian ethnicity...I just find this absolutely boggling and I wonder if it is like this in other countries. (don't get me wrong, this has absolutely NOTHING to do with prejudice, and I am not in any way, but this seriously pisses me off.)

question......."What is a poofter" Answer...."bent as a nine bob note"

The greatest part of wisdom is learning to develop  the ineffable genius of extracting the "neither here nor there" out of any situation...."

I still don't get it :|

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Have you ever heard "the Lumberjack Song" from Monty Python? At the end of the song the girl says " you're such a poofter". For those of you who never heard of the song here are the lyrics. Lumberjack Song I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay. I sleep all night. I work all day. Mounties : He's a lumberjack, and he's okay. He sleeps all night and he works all day. I cut down trees. I eat my lunch. I go to the lavatory. On Wednesdays I go shoppin' And have buttered scones for tea. Mounties: He cuts down trees. He eats his lunch. He goes to the lavatory. On Wednesdays he goes shopping And has buttered scones for tea. Chorus : I'm (He's) a lumberjack, and I'm (he's) okay. I (He) sleep(s) all night and I (he) work(s) all day. I cut down trees. I skip and jump. I like to press wild flowers. I put on women's clothing And hang around in bars. Mounties : He cuts down trees. He skips and jumps. He likes to press wild flowers. He puts on women's clothing And hangs around in bars?! Chorus : I'm (He's) a lumberjack, and I'm (he's) okay. I (He) sleep(s) all night and I (he) work(s) all day. I cut down trees. I wear high heels, Suspendies, and a bra. I wish I'd been a girlie, Just like my dear Mama (or Papa in later versions) Mounties : He cuts down trees. He wears high heels, Suspendies, and a bra?! Chorus : I'm (He's) a lumberjack, and I'm (he's) okay. I (He) sleep(s) all night and I (he) work(s) all day. Yes, I'm (He's) a lumberjack, and I'm (he's) ok-a-y. I (He) sleep(s) all night and I (he) work(s) all day.

man that dress up like woman. eew! they do need a moony :)

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#1 People who think God will like them better if they kill me. #2 People who need warning labels on normal items (Do not use iron on clothes being worn! The beverage you are about to enjoy may be very hot!) #3 Alec Baldwin who promised to move out of the country if George Bush was elected. I still haven't seen that change of address form...

Just about every actor has done drag, :-D some better than others. I dressed my brother up as a girl when we were kids. But if you're gonna give the guys a mooney for dressing like a woman, don't be sexest and include women who dress like men. Nothing I hate worse than checkin out a hot guy only to realize he's a woman.

I used to go out with an Italian guy who had waist length black hair, during one summer when we were out walking, both wearing tshirts and cycle shorts, we got whistled at and they shouted hello gorgeous. As the guys caught up with us they got a shock when he turned to look at them and they caught site of his moustashe. lol 8) Catlin

A 'poofter' is a homosexual.....get it now? Usualy associated with Australians or Canadians, whereas 'Fags' or 'Faggots' is from the USA.....

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All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster

And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...

And all these terms are of no use, the only term that matters is human being. 8)

"A 'poofter' is a homosexual.....get it now?" I don't have a problem with homosexuals, but they don't have to dress up like a woman while they're actually a man (or the other way around as Ang said) and act weird and stuff like that.

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Ray: you mean you'd prefer it if they didn't 'queen' it up and mince around the place....? And talk about 'cod-feelies' and 'bona-palones'.........

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All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster

And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...

i'm learning all kinds of new terms in this thread. although i'm not sure i even want to know what cod-feelies and bona-palones are.

me neither DP :)

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I can just imagine what those terms mean...LOL I agree with Catlin, we are all human beings and as long as no one tries to force their preferences on me, we can all get along. The thing that gets me the most though, is when these guys dress up and look better than I do! LOL

And now that I got the grumpyness out of my system.... My three moonies go to 1. Hillary Clinton and her husband 2. The ACLU 3. Wahabbism And the lifetime achievement award goes to Yassir Arafa. Now I feel better.

Just on the off chance that someone might misunderstand Rule 6 and think I'm picking on gay people, I feel I should explain that I was quoting from a Monty Python sketch about the philosophy department of an Austalian university all of whom are named Bruce (and are not gay). Parts of several of my rules were "borrowed" from the reading of the rules in that sketch. It was not included to offend anyone. Thanks, Tjohn

This is not my "second childhood". I'm not finished with the first one yet.

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

"I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather....not screaming in terror like the passengers on his bus." - Jack Handy

I knew it was Monty Python, an award coming from you tjohn, it had to have a Python script attached somewhere. 8) Catlin And I agree with Colette, how dare guys look better than us women when they dress up and put makeup on. 8P

What worries me are the guys who are 'straight' and can't wait to drag-it-up at any excuse.............

Available on Amazon for the Kindle E-Reader

All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster

And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...

Can't say I have ever met one of those..:)

I did have a boyfriend one time who liked to dress up in my clothes, and he did make a very attractive looking woman. He would never let me take a photo though, I guess that would have been incriminating evidence for when he gets rich and famous, if ever. 8) Catlin

Thats nothing new when it comes to the Scots. They've been dressing up in skirts for years.............!

Available on Amazon for the Kindle E-Reader

All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster

And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...

Now now, you know why they call it a kilt don't you? The last man who called it a skirt GOT kilt! ;c)

ROFL....................8D