jupiterkris opened this issue on Mar 04, 2005 ยท 5 posts
jupiterkris posted Fri, 04 March 2005 at 12:15 AM
DANGER: new viruses discovered! Congressional Virus v 2.0 : Runs every program on the hard drive simultaneously, but doesn't allow the user to accomplish anything. Tipper Gore Virus : When you attempt to play any sound file, it pops up a warning window stating that some lyrics may be unsuitable for children. Government Ecomomist Virus : Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine. New World Order Virus : Probably harmless, but it makes a lot of people really mad just thinking about it. Warren Commission Virus : Won't allow you to open your files for 75 years. David Duke Virus : Makes your screen go completely white. Pat Buchanan Virus : Shifts all your output to the extreme right of your screen. Texas Virus : Makes sure it's bigger than any other file. Adam And Eve Virus : Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple. Warren Beatty Virus : Constantly tries to prove it's virility by attaching itself to younger or newer files. Airline Virus : You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore. Freudian Virus : Your computer becomes obsessed with marrying its own motherboard. PBS Virus : Your PC stops what it's doing every few minutes to ask for money. Jimmy Hoffa Virus : Nobody can find it. Kevorkian Virus : Helps your computer shut down whenever it wants to. Healthcare Virus : Tests your system for a day, finds nothing wrong, and sends a you a bill for $4,500. LAPD Virus : It claims it feels threatened by the other files on your PC and erases them in "self-defence". Billy Graham Virus : When you save a file, it prints, "I am saved!" to the screen. Michael Jackson Virus : Hard to identify because it is constantly altering its appearance. This Virus won't harm your PC, but it will trash your car. And finally... JokeGalore.com Virus : poses as a harmless list of funny computer Virus names! Is quickly passed from one user to all other users known via e-mail, consequently consuming all known network resources. http://www.ajokes.com/jokes/240.html
BDC posted Fri, 04 March 2005 at 1:45 AM
I see they forgot the alfranken virus, its hard for anti-virus programs to pin down, and upon infection it immediately begins too randomly spam misrepresentations and untrue rumors about the system administrator to everyone and anyone.
"In times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act" ~George Orwell
Zhann posted Fri, 04 March 2005 at 3:09 AM
Very funny stuff!
Bryce Forum Coordinator....
Vision is the Art of seeing things invisible...
anniemation posted Fri, 04 March 2005 at 10:07 PM
American Idol Computer Virus: It votes on what it deletes.
jupiterkris posted Sun, 06 March 2005 at 7:51 PM
Poser Virus : Mutates every couple of years into more powerful strains . Daz Virus : Propagates new mesh and textures to feed the ever hungry Poser Virus .