DANGER: new viruses discovered! Congressional Virus v 2.0 : Runs every program on the hard drive simultaneously, but doesn't allow the user to accomplish anything. Tipper Gore Virus : When you attempt to play any sound file, it pops up a warning window stating that some lyrics may be unsuitable for children. Government Ecomomist Virus : Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine. New World Order Virus : Probably harmless, but it makes a lot of people really mad just thinking about it. Warren Commission Virus : Won't allow you to open your files for 75 years. David Duke Virus : Makes your screen go completely white. Pat Buchanan Virus : Shifts all your output to the extreme right of your screen. Texas Virus : Makes sure it's bigger than any other file. Adam And Eve Virus : Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple. Warren Beatty Virus : Constantly tries to prove it's virility by attaching itself to younger or newer files. Airline Virus : You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore. Freudian Virus : Your computer becomes obsessed with marrying its own motherboard. PBS Virus : Your PC stops what it's doing every few minutes to ask for money. Jimmy Hoffa Virus : Nobody can find it. Kevorkian Virus : Helps your computer shut down whenever it wants to. Healthcare Virus : Tests your system for a day, finds nothing wrong, and sends a you a bill for $4,500. LAPD Virus : It claims it feels threatened by the other files on your PC and erases them in "self-defence". Billy Graham Virus : When you save a file, it prints, "I am saved!" to the screen. Michael Jackson Virus : Hard to identify because it is constantly altering its appearance. This Virus won't harm your PC, but it will trash your car. And finally... JokeGalore.com Virus : poses as a harmless list of funny computer Virus names! Is quickly passed from one user to all other users known via e-mail, consequently consuming all known network resources. http://www.ajokes.com/jokes/240.html