diolma opened this issue on Aug 31, 2007 · 33 posts
diolma posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 12:07 PM
This morning I set off to visit my infirm mother.
Mum died while I was walking from the station to the hospital.
On the way back home I stopped in a cafe for a cup of tea.While drinking it I broke down and cried.
Nobody noticed.
I came home and decided to type this.
But the screen keeps going blurry and I have a headache.
I think I'll have an early night.
vkirchner posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 12:46 PM
Very sorry to hear the news. Our families thoughts and prayers are with you in the coming months. Vince
sackrat posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 12:52 PM
Sorry for your loss.
"Any club that would have me as a member is probably not worth joining" -Groucho Marx
SAMS3D posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 1:20 PM
So sorry fro your loss, out thoughts are with you during this time of sorrow. Sharen
tom271 posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 1:27 PM
Sorry for your loss Diolma...
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alexcoppo posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 3:45 PM
I know how you feel; exactly 27 months ago it was my turn to come back from hospital alone, entering the darkest night in my life.
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Incarnadine posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 3:50 PM
So sorry to hear.
Pass no temptation lightly by, for one never knows when it may pass again!
chohole posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 3:55 PM
My thoughts are with you. I too missed my Mother's passing. I had visited the day before, was due to visit the next day (3 hour journey each way). She had seemed so much better last time I saw her.
Remember the good times.
The greatest part of wisdom is learning to develop the ineffable genius of extracting the "neither here nor there" out of any situation...."
vangogh posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 5:11 PM
My sympathies are with you. What a terrible way to lose a loved one....not having a chance to say goodbye.
diolma posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 5:32 PM
Many thanks for your condolences, they are all very much appreciated.
I tried the "early to bed" bit, but couldn't sleep.
So I've decided to get drunk instead.I'll go to bed when I either can't read or can't type..
I would usually finish "Cheers, Diolma", but I can't find it in me to do so just at the moment.
Analog-X64 posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 5:35 PM
Sorry for you're loss, please take care of you'reself.
Death_at_Midnight posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 6:40 PM
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. My thoughts are with you.
AnnieD posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 8:59 PM
So sorry :sad:
“For those who believe, no proof is necessary. For those who don't believe, no proof is possible.”
[Stuart Chase]
RodsArt posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 10:24 PM
Thoughts are with you.......
___
Ockham's razor- It's that simple
skiwillgee posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 10:56 PM
My prayers and thoughts for you and your family also. It is comforting to know that so many in this community care for one another.
johnyf posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 11:02 PM
My sympathies at this sad time.
ellocolobo posted Fri, 31 August 2007 at 11:13 PM
You are not crying alone now my friend...If you ever need anybody to talk with...Please..
Vile posted Sat, 01 September 2007 at 2:22 AM
I am not good at stuff like this as some here know. But I am sorry for your loss.
AB
TheBryster posted Sat, 01 September 2007 at 8:23 AM Online Now! Forum Moderator
Our condolenses at this sad time. We watched my wife's mother pass away last year after her long battle with dementia. We understand how you must feel.
Perhaps the people in a cafe' felt your loss too and just respected your need to be lone? I think that's what I would do.
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And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...
FranOnTheEdge posted Sun, 02 September 2007 at 12:55 PM
Oh Diolma, I'm so sorry to hear about your mother.
Such a loss is never easy to cope with - just know that we are thinking of you, and we are here if you need to talk.
Fran
Measure
your mind's height
by the shade it casts.
Robert Browning (Paracelsus)
Quest posted Sun, 02 September 2007 at 2:10 PM
What sad news indeed. One of the loneliest and emptiest feelings when one loses one that is close to you. A while back I was browsing through the “In Memory Of” gallery over at 3D Commune when I came across this beautiful tribute offered by one of my favorite Bryce artist Deanna Hancock. Please take some solace from this rendering and poem. My prayers and sympathies are with you and your family.
Quest
Gog posted Sun, 02 September 2007 at 5:24 PM
Thoughts and prayers are with you, my mum passed away some 7 years ago, but it still hurts sometimes.
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Rayraz posted Sun, 02 September 2007 at 5:56 PM
Im sorry for ur loss man. my condolences.
Now dont go drinkin too much ok? Last time i drunk outta sadness i nearly got myself alcohol poisoning. Its not really the best mindstate to get drunk in.
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Ang25 posted Mon, 03 September 2007 at 10:03 AM
My thoughts are with you. I hope that you can find some comfort, some solace during this difficult and sad time.
bikermouse posted Fri, 21 September 2007 at 12:25 AM
My mother died last February so I know what you must be going through. There are still times when I feel like talking to her and when I realize she's gone I feel great loss - my only consolation is that she lived a full live and finally went off to be with her Lord.
I feel your loss - TJ
Conniekat8 posted Fri, 21 September 2007 at 11:52 AM
Oh, Diolma, I'm so sorry to hear about your loss.
Sending you some big warm comforting hugs!
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waldomac posted Fri, 21 September 2007 at 4:54 PM
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. Our prayers are with you. As the cafe crowd appeared to show, we're all too caught up in our day-to-day junk sometimes to offer a simple kindness to someone in pain. I'm gratified to know that, at least here at Renderosity, we can still see it within ourselves to care about others.
I wish I had more words of comfort, but there just isn't a magic phrase for the kind of pain and loss you're feeling. Know that I will continue to pray for you. God is the God of more than enough, so He can comfort when we are helpless.
On a personal note, thank you for sharing your loss with us. Even though our words are inadequate, I am glad that you'd trust us with your personal feelings.
diolma posted Sat, 22 September 2007 at 8:13 PM
Once again, many thanks for your condolences.
I've just got back from the ceremony of "interring the ashes" (mother was cremated a week ago). Such a small remnant of a vibrant woman...
I'm now going to make some possibly contraversial staements, but they're true...
I'm not a very emotional person.
I'm an atheist.
I found the ceremonies (the pre-cremation one and the interment later) moving in a small way but I got put off by all the (undoubtedly well-intentioned but to my mind unsupported) statements regarding "in the after-life". I don't believe in it, and cannot be convinced.
I will remember mother, with great affection. But she is gone and that is that. Sad, but true.
To me, to maintain (as the vicar did in the cermonies) that she is "still alive, but somewhere else" seems rather condescending. It was hard attending these ceremonies, but I had to do it to give support to the rest of the family - I may be an atheist, but I know my duty.
I'm almost over my mourning now. I know that I'll have "flashbacks" for the next few years, but eventually that'll fade. Like it did for my father, many years ago.
But I still very much appreciate the warm support that's been given by this forum, whether from a theological perspective or from a purely humanitarian one. Sympathy is non-demoninational (in fact it's non-religious) - it's just a very human and welcome attitude.
Many thanks again,
Diolma
Quest posted Sun, 23 September 2007 at 1:55 AM
Diolma, I’m glad to hear that you are almost over your mourning my friend, a very hard thing to do over such a short period of time. It is obvious that your personal beliefs are not of concern when so many people, from different parts of the world, from different believes can come as one to the side of a fellow member in their time of bereavement and loss. So it is not a question of belief but a statement of international cohesiveness and understanding amongst people. May your coming days fill brighter in the sunlight of life to come.
Quest
wawadave posted Sun, 23 September 2007 at 11:23 PM
My condolences for your loss i do know the feeling. mine died on xmass day after i had not got around to calling her.
Conniekat8 posted Mon, 24 September 2007 at 10:51 PM
Diolma, I'm not terribly religious either... what I found comforting when my grandma passed away is to think of her "afterlife" being in memories of her, things she instilled in her children (my mom and my aunt) and in her grandchildren, me and my aunt's two boys.
So, your mom is still with you in a way... I hope you know her well enough where you know (to a degree) what she would say, or how she would interact with you. There's a lot of her spirit (not in a mystical or religious sense) but in an emotional sense, that is still here, with you.
Hugz, Connie
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max- posted Thu, 27 September 2007 at 12:32 PM
Yes, it's a sad time when that happens, but time heals that sadness.
"An Example is worth Ten Thousand Words"
brycetech posted Thu, 27 September 2007 at 10:08 PM
time heals all wounds...
or so they say anyhow...
deepest condolences...
BT