Got these in my mail today....

 

 

1. TEACHER:    Maria, go to the map and find   North America  . 

MARIA:         Here it  is. 

TEACHER:   Correct.  Now class, who discovered   America ? 

CLASS:         Maria.

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2.TEACHER:   John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? 

JOHN:          You told me to do it without using tables.

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3. TEACHER:  Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?' 

GLENN:      K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'

TEACHER:  No, that's wrong 

GLENN:       Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.  

(I  Love this child) 

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4. TEACHER:   Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? 

DONALD:     H I J K L M N O.

TEACHER:   What are you talking about? 

DONALD:    Yesterday you said it's H to O.  

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5. TEACHER:   Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. 

WINNIE:       Me!

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6. TEACHER:   Glen, why do you always get so dirty? 

GLEN:          Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.  

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7. TEACHER:     Millie, give me a sentence starting with '  I.  ' 

MILLIE:         I  is..

TEACHER:     No, Millie..... Always say, 'I  am.' 

MILLIE:         All right...  'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'    

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8 . TEACHER:    George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it.  

                   Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him? 

LOUIS:           Because George still had the axe in his hand....    

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9. TEACHER:    Now, Simon , tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? 

SIMON:         No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.  

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9. TEACHER:       Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your   brother's.. Did you copy his? 

CLYDE  :         No, sir. It's the same dog.    

 

(I want to adopt this kid!!!) 

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10.TEACHER:    Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

HAROLD:     A teacher

Available on Amazon for the Kindle E-Reader

All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster

And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...

Hehehehehe
Some very cool ones! :-D

Thanks for the laughs.

Corrie

Wonderful! LOL!!!

Hubert 

"All that we see or fear, is but a Sphere inside a Sphere."     (E. A. Pryce -- Tuesday afternoon, 1845)

Very funny.....!

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:biggrin:

:lol:

 

Very funny and cute... I loved #7 and both # 9s!

 

“For those who believe, no proof is necessary. For those who don't believe, no proof is possible.”

[Stuart Chase]

:)

LOL! No 9 made me giggle.. can imagine some kid I know saying jus that! 

Thanks for the giggles...

Kids logic, you can't beat it.

Robert van der Veeke Basugasubasubasu Basugasubakuhaku Gasubakuhakuhaku!! "Better is the enemy of good enough." Dr. Mikoyan of the Mikoyan Gurevich Design Bureau.