I wanted to investigate changing Internet/Cable provider and as soon as I hit the website a livechat box opened.  I figured, why not, and clicked.  This is what transpired.

BTW, the livechat box had rightclick copy disabled, but ctrl-c / ctrl-v still worked fine.

You can't make this stuff up:

A V**** Service Representative will be with you shortly. Thank you. (15:24:36)**

Agent Grace has joined. (15:24:41)

Grace : Chat ID for this session is $$$$$$$$$$$$. (15:24:41)

Grace(15:24:41): Hello. Thank you for choosing V**** and visiting our V****** chat service. How can I help you set up you new service and save with a V****** bundle?**

You(15:25:09): i am interested in internet and cable, but no landline phone

Grace(15:25:34): Thank you for considering V**** services, I will be glad to assist you with your online orders process.**

You(15:25:51): I don't see a bundle without phone

Grace(15:26:17): Let me provide you a link to the bundles of your choice.

Grace(15:26:32): https://www22.V****.com//NBundles.aspx* **
Please on the above link and enter your address to order your services today.**

Grace(15:26:52): Please let me know once you are on build bundle page, so that I can assist you in selecting the best services for you.

You(15:26:59): Ok thanks

You(15:27:29): Well that didn't work - it has phone (which i don't want) preselected.

**You(15:28:23): I hope *S is faster than the live chat responses.

Grace(15:28:48): Let me assist you step by step to assist you further.

Grace(15:28:48): To assist you with your equipment selection, could you please tell me the number of Tvs you want to hook up?

You(15:29:08): Let's say four.

Grace(15:29:18): Please unchck

Grace(15:29:23): Excellent! Do you require the recording capability for that?

You(15:29:34): Huh?

Grace(15:29:49): Please uncheck phone and click on Select and Customize tab to proceed further.

Grace(15:30:19): Would you be intersted in recording feature for your TVs?

You(15:30:57): I unchecked phone, and now it says no internet plans are eligible for bundle savings.

Grace(15:31:37): Please do not see that it is for the people ordering triple bundle.

You(15:32:12): Too late, I've already seen it. Wow, back to B*house.

Grace(15:32:12): Please proceed and let me know when you are on TV page.

You(15:32:17): OK, I’m there.

**Grace(15:33:02): Would you be initerested in proceed with *S order?

You(15:33:17): Not at this rate. Thanks.

Grace(15:33:57): Let me share some promotions for you. May be you will be liking them.

You(15:34:22): Do you guys realize you are trying to sell high speed internet with a PAINFULLY slow live chat application?

Grace(15:35:07): I apologize, if you think the chat is slow for you.

You(15:35:18): Bangalore or Mexico City?

Grace(15:35:33): Would you be initerested in knowing the promotions for you?

You(15:35:48): Sure, why not. You only live once, eh?

Grace(15:36:48): You can get 1 Multi Room DVR and 1 SD set top box free for life with triple play bundle and uou will get installation upto 3 TVs free if you have a coaxial outlet.

Grace(15:37:28): You will also get 1 wireless router of $139.99 free for you.

You(15:37:41): I do not have any SD televisions.

Grace(15:38:36): In that case, you can take the Multi room DVR free for life.

You(15:38:55): what would you do with my SD set top box?

Grace(15:39:22): Would you like to proceed with triple **** bundle to get this promotions for you?

You(15:39:35): Why does V**** offer SD converters on an all fiber network?**

Grace(15:40:06): It is because every customer can not afford to have HD TVs.

You(15:39:35): really?  I would think SOME could afford it.

Grace(15:40:56): This is SD set top box free for life only for some locations.  Maybe not you?

You(15:41:05): OK, but you can see where that leaves me thinking the "special offer" isn't for me as I have to leave part of it on the table, right?

Grace(15:41:55): If you do not wish to continue with the order then you can come online anytime to see the offers available for you.

Grace(15:42:00): Is there anything else I can assist you with? I will be more than happy to help you with that.

You(15:42:01): Grace, is there a secret number I can call and talk to someone about hooking up?

Grace(15:42:36): Yes, let me provide you a number to get more information for you.

Grace(15:43:21): Please contact our Consumer Sales and Solutions Center directly at: (800) V**** or (800) 8**-**, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Grace(15:43:26): Our representatives will be happy to help you.

Grace(15:43:31): Do you have any other questions I can help you with?

You(15:44:02): Not really.  Thanks!

Lotus 123 ~ S-Render ~ OS/2 WARP ~ IBM 8088 / 4.77 Mhz ~ Hercules Ultima graphics, Hitachi 10 MB HDD, 64K RAM, 12 in diagonal CRT Monitor (16 colors / 60 Hz refresh rate), 240 Watt PS, Dual 1.44 MB Floppies, 2 button mouse input device.  Beige horizontal case.  I don't display my unit.