erosiaart opened this issue on Dec 20, 2011 · 10 posts
erosiaart posted Tue, 20 December 2011 at 5:41 AM
PLEASE READ. All employees planning to dash through the snow in a one horse open sleigh, going over the fields and laughing all the way are advised that a Risk Assessment will be required addressing the safety of an open sleigh for members of the public. This assessment must also consider whether it is appropriate to use only one horse for such a venture, particularly where there are multiple passengers. Please note that permission must also be obtained in writing from landowners before their fields may be entered. To avoid offending those not participating in celebrations, we would request that laughter is moderate only and not loud enough to be considered a noise nuisance.
Benches, stools and orthopedic chairs are now available for collection by any shepherds planning or required to watch their flocks at night. While provision has also been made for remote monitoring of flocks by CCTV cameras from a centrally heated shepherd observation hut, all users of this facility are reminded that an emergency response plan must be submitted to account for known risks to the flocks. The angel of the Lord is additionally reminded that, prior to shining his/her glory all around, s/he must confirm that all shepherds are wearing appropriate Personal Protective Equipment to account for the harmful effects of UVA, UVB and the overwhelming effects of Glory.
Following last years well-publicised case, everyone is advised that Equal Opportunities legislation prohibits any comment with regard to the redness of any part of Mr R Reindeer. Further to this, exclusion of Mr R Reindeer from reindeer games will be considered discriminatory and disciplinary action will be taken against those found guilty of this offence.
While it is acknowledged that gift bearing is a common practice in various parts of the world, particularly the Orient, everyone is reminded that the bearing of gifts is subject to Hospitality Guidelines and all gifts must be registered. This applies regardless of the individual, even royal personages. It is particularly noted that direct gifts of currency or gold are specifically precluded, while caution is advised regarding other common gifts such as aromatic resins that may evoke allergic reactions.
Finally, in the recent instance of the infant found tucked up in a manger without any crib for a bed, Social Services have been advised and will be arriving shortly
BlackStarr42 posted Tue, 20 December 2011 at 6:56 AM
LOL
peedy posted Tue, 20 December 2011 at 8:45 AM
ROTFL! :-D
Corrie
ThunderStone posted Tue, 20 December 2011 at 9:26 AM
:b_funny:
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9/11/2001: Never forget...
Smiles are contagious... Pass it on!
Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday
TheBryster posted Tue, 20 December 2011 at 2:04 PM Forum Moderator
OMG!!!! ROTFLMAO!
Available on Amazon for the Kindle E-Reader
All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster
And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...
Quest posted Tue, 20 December 2011 at 6:40 PM
ROTFL…this smacks of either political correctness or disclaimer legalese...I can't tell which.
skiwillgee posted Tue, 20 December 2011 at 9:44 PM
Dang, the fun is being taken out of everything!!!!!! What is next? The rights of turkeys at Thanksgiving? My word.
Good one Rosie
PS
Rudolph has a red nose, Rudolph has a red nose, Rudolph has a red nose, Rudolph has a red nose, Rudolph has a red nose, Rudolph has a red nose, Rudolph has a red nose, Rudolph has a red nose,
Catch me if you can! Whee!
tom271 posted Wed, 21 December 2011 at 12:31 AM
Well, Happy holidays....! Lol
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FranOnTheEdge posted Wed, 21 December 2011 at 7:40 AM
Well it had to happen sometime - Loved this Rosie - triffic!
Measure
your mind's height
by the shade it casts.
Robert Browning (Paracelsus)
Ang25 posted Fri, 23 December 2011 at 6:39 PM
Ahhhh... too funny!