*"Got my top hat, got my white coat... All I need is the --* Hey! Wheres the girl?" "Oh, you mean the girl who was here a little while ago? She left." "Left??" "Something about allergies to plants." "So who are you???" "Im her stand-in." "Her *what*?" "Stand-in? Like, I stand... *in*? Boy, and let me tell you, this one wasnt easy. What size is this thing anyway, a 2? Well, I just morphed it up a bit -- us hefty girls need our space, yknow? -- and now it fits snugger than a bug on a rug, specially right around the -- " "Dont tell me! I dont want to know!" "So hows this for a pose? Awww, dont look all shocked. Im sure youve seen lots of naked women in your time, baby." "But -- " "Tell you what: lets get this done, and then Ill show you why they call it a *broadsword*. *Come to Mama, Maury, baby!!!!!*"