to some wonderful friends I have made on 'rosity. I apologise for not responding to you all individually, but that would be too hard a task for me to do. Therefore, this a heartfelt message to all the decent 'rosity members I have come to know and respect during my brief time here. I just had a telephone call from a friend. She is not interested in 3D graphics as such, but lurks around 'rosity to see what I have been up to. My friend knows about my past and knows what my present problem is. She asked if I knew what sort of reaction my recent posts had caused. I won't repeat my answer to her, for as she said, I was completely wrong! I had to come back to see and a part of me wishes I hadn't..! I am overwhelmed by your messages. I unashamedly admit to being reduced to yet more tears; this time of a different kind. Several of your messages, which although kind and well meaning, actually add to my grief, because of their innocent, but to me meaningful, phraseology. How can I leave you worrying about me like this? I can't! It would be totally unfair and I don't want you to remember me unkindly, for I am not an unkindly person. Several people suggested I take a break, which is what I intend to do. I always suffer from a deep depression at Christmastime, but this time it has been accelerated by some very unkind people. Somebody said that 'rosity is like an extended family and that there are always Black Sheep in most families. I see 'rosity as a micro-World; we are many people from many places with different cultures and beliefs. Unfortunately, the 'rosity World is a lot like the Real World, which has become a cruel and spiteful place. Somebody else suggested that I should practise yoga as a way of releasing my tension. Thank you for the suggestion, but I already have a preferred method. I load my dogs into the car and drive a few miles away to a beautiful spot called Formby Point, which overlooks the sea. We make our way to the top of the tallest sand dune; then with the sea in front of us and the scent of ancient pine trees wafting over us from behind... we sit, throw back our heads and howl at the Moon, or nearest star on Moonless nights. Samoyeds are great howlers and it only takes the first line of "Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's off to work we goooooo!" to get them started. We howl until our voices break and I can shed no more tears. But... at least I am able to release some of the grief I feel. I will be back eventually. How could I stay away from so many friends for too long..? I just have to get through this phase I am in and I can only do that by myself. While I am absent, I shall continue with my personal artwork, which I find a good method of releasing and expressing my emotions. At some stage, I shall continue to build my personal website, which I am determined to launch; probably and hopefully in the New Year. Some of what I am going through at the moment will be explained on my website, in a dedication to a very special person; my brother, who I miss so much and without whom, I am only half the person we used to be. A few personal wishes: Please... don't worry about me. I WILL come through this. No more messages... they are not needed. I know already what the kinder of you would say. Continue with your artwork; be it good or bad and remember... that the newbies and those who aren't quite as self assured as most of you, appreciate a little encouragement now and then. Enjoy your Christmas wherever and however you celebrate it. Be kind to each other, both in the 'rosity World and in the Real World. As a famous Irish comedian used to say at the end of his shows... "May your Gods go with you". Best wishes, lots of love and peace, ziggie PS Don't worry about my little furry friends... I am sure I will be able to revive them. And... hey... I will have to come back... to see what you all get up to with Anton's pussy cat. Bet you all, you get one for Christmas!

"You don't have to be mad to use Poser... but it helps"