First of all I'm not a writer but I do want to tell you something about me. I got starting on Renderosity from a friend called Vaggabondd to occupy some of my time. Vaggabondd is my best friend, he helped me go through some difficult times. July 14, 2006 my husband of 35 yrs. died of lung cancer, he only lived 22 days after getting diagnose. Then to top it off 3 weeks later my place of employment of 17 yrs. closed the plant. I was able to attend college( paid) and I got a degree on Dec. 2008 in Accounting. I also have a site for my husband's pictures under Dukelars if you want to check it out. Really my husband was the photography in the family this is all new to me, like everything else. I've got my family close and my Cessna (cat) which there are cute stories about ,if you want to know and she also grief with me. I still feel I'm in a dream and can't wake up. Well enough about me and hope you enjoy what I've taught myself with this wonderful computer my husband left me when he was alive, I was afraid to touch it because something always happen to it.
Hugs
M'lee
Update: Life is moving along to fast for me....Since this writing I have lost Cessna, she died last June 2015...It was the hardest thing I had to do putting her to sleep. Also I have now lost both of my parents. I have 3 lovely grand children all girls. and growing up to fast.
Comments (8)
auntietk
I'm sorry you're having a rough time, Sweetie! I'll be thinking of you, sending you good stuff.
Thelby
My Heart goes out to you. Having lost my wife in 1995 I do understand. Know this, you never get over it, but you do get through it. It's tough, but remember the Dreams you shared, the times you had, the Love that melted together into the pool of your life and Cherish Them All!!!!! God Bless You my Dear and Strengthen you in this time!!!!!!
alhak
Merrylee, so many nights I too think what if and if I could change things...my thoughts are with you. My mum always tells me things happen for a reason and she is always right, it takes time though but there is light and hope at the end, hang in there! Big hugs your way!
vaggabondd
Merrylee this is a very sad and true poem. I don't like how sad you are but I sure like the way you tapped into your feelings and shared them with us. Very nice
JaneEden
Merrylee I am so sorry you feel so sad, but my friend your emotional strength will return, even though you never forget. I too was left on my own to bring up 3 very young children and also not well most of the time, it was hard and lonely at times but I moved on eventually. I took up dog breeding and showing and then tried different mediums in art and made myself take an interest in life again and everything around me, it took me out of my dark world and into a newer brighter one. Now my illness is worse and I feel very sad some days, and yes also do think of the ones that I have now gone that could comfort me in their arms, but I have found such comfort from the people here on Renderosity many of whom too have sad times or illness to deal with, which made me feel not so alone. I really hope that very soon you can get really deeply involved in something which will take your mind of the past a bit, and take you into the future. Try to think positive, be safe, e-mail me if you want to pour out what troubles you, and take care - I am sending you love, God Bless and hugs Jane xx
Mad-Mike
Awww darling... I feel for you :'( I wish the best to happen to you in life :-) take care darling.
mcanning
Sorry to hear of your difficulties. My father recently passed away after battling with Alzheimer's disease, then I learned that a school friend of 30 years back committed suicide. This is the tribute I sent to our school friends who are all still in touch after all these years. "In fond memory of Paula. Hold friends, love and light close. Reach out for them should darkness prevail." You have friends here too. Hold them close. I love your work, and loved your comment about watching the moon in my garden. Let that be your place of inner glow. Michael
Flannelman
Hmmm .... My thoughts exactly. But its really cool to wake up every morning ;-) ;-) ;-)