~Staying Safe In His Hands~ by originalkitten

Poser • Atmosphere/Mood • posted on Oct 25, 2008

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Description

Today, you would have had your first birthday, child I never knew, child I never bore. Small daughter dead, small mass that had not yet grown hair, small particle of life with tiny lips that never touched my breasts and tiny feet that never learned to walk: your heartbeat ceased at my command. And yet your heart has never ceased its beating: pulsing in an air you never breathed against a skin you have never touched. I will never silence you with candy or come with light to frighten off your ghosts or hold you tight through noisy thunder storms; and yet I hear you calling in the wind and feel your ghost in darkness of the night and shiver for you when the lightning strikes. I chose your death deliberately. Yet trust me when I say there was nothing deliberate in my choice at all, only a passion of terror and desire for that innocence of life I yearned for before you were conceived. That innocence is gone forever now, replaced with something darker than your birth. I, who would have stayed forever spotless, made a choice that stains my soul forever. Believe me, little one who never breathed, little one I wanted to love, believe me, child who plays in deathless fields; believe me, you who never touched my breasts and never brought a smile unto my lips: I love you day by day and year by year. You keep on growing inside my heart and soul. And I have learned through all these days and nights my grief for you is heavy as the years. by Sondra Ball. (some words changed slightly) (for those who have no idea....it was for health reasons. I'd be dead if I hadn't) ~~ What keeps me going is she's happy and safe in his hands. ~~~ Tis also my 10 year olds birthday today but he's on vacation with an organisation that takes kids who help care for sick parents away for a few days. I miss him like crazy but hope he's having a blast. First picture I did for her is here http://www.renderosity.com/mod/gallery/index.php?image_id=1408982

Comments (28)

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MegaJax

4:09AM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Awwww Lou, this is just so beautiful.

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Richardphotos

4:14AM | Sat, 25 October 2008

I know your pain as I lost a 2 year old daughter

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pc_artist

4:26AM | Sat, 25 October 2008

BIG HUGSSS.... nice image.. Sorry to learn ofr your loss.

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Penters

5:06AM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Ah Lou you really have had a rough time, but keep your chin up chuck. xox

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debbielove

5:19AM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Babe? You know I care for you. I'm always here for you. A beautiful picture. Made from the heart with love. Bless you. Thinking of you, Rob.

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PapaSkip

6:23AM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Very sweet image ... sooo sorry ... Loss of a child is the most painful thing.

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DarQueBird

6:28AM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Oh this is just beautiful.. Sending gentle hugs..

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priss117

6:36AM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Oh my you made me weep.

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deadsomething

7:44AM | Sat, 25 October 2008

such a beautiful piece :) i'm happy to know I'm in God's hands just like her in the picture :)

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EnaR

9:35AM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Very beautiful...........

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RodolfoCiminelli

11:06AM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Beautiful and creative Hig Key......!!!!!

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MKeyes

12:26PM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Oh my my my my my - that was so stirring, I could not but read on to the next line and then the next! While this might be misunderstood by some, your heartache, struggle and pain, strengthens my faith in womenkind, that there are still some of us, who love our children to the depths of our souls, as you did this little one and it shows! Outstanding image to depict the hands she now lies in, have peace within yourself - were a better choice available, you would have taken it, I can see it and feel it in your words! Bless you...

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Star4mation

1:03PM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Beautiful tribute to Arial, Lou. Thinking of you :)

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LudyMelltSekher

2:23PM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Hello my dear friend Louise, WOOW!!BEATIFULL TRIBUTE!! This is a fantastic, surprising work, of very good quality. Gives a lot of flavor to enter to your gallery and to enjoy so much beauty! Congratulations!! A million stars**** thank you so much for your comments and enjoys a pretty weekend. luminous Blessings. Ludy

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lyron

2:30PM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Very cute work!

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pixelmeister

6:36PM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Beautiful Work!

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ontar1

10:21PM | Sat, 25 October 2008

Beautiful!!!!

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wanderinglupa

12:24AM | Sun, 26 October 2008

Wow..I have 4 children..my youngest surprise is sleeping on my lap as I type..this made me look at her and give her extra hugs and kisses. I could not imagine my life without any of my babies..I cannot imagine your grief and I am sorry for such a great loss..

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