Having been born and raised in a tent just outside Leavesden Mental Asylum where both my parents were inmates, I always knew I was special. Even when I was at school I stood out from the crowd, some said it was because I was wearing a potato sack and they all had uniforms but I say it was personality that seperated me from the pack.
After leaving school I struggled to make a living for a while until a chance encounter with a street walker in Watford High Street. After that I made my fortune from call girls paying me not to sleep with them.Â
Despite my new found wealth I was still very lonely until one day I met a blind, deaf, mute woman with no sense of smell and had two very ugly children with her. Alas her sense of smell returned and once again I found myself alone. So if you're very ugly and have no self respect, give me a call. I'll let you buy me dinner.
Some of the above might be slightly misleading or entirely untrue.Â
I was raised in Leavesden, just outside Watford England. That much was true. They filmed Goldeneye at Leavesden Studios actually. Fascinating huh? It was a Rolls Royce aeroplane engine plant when I lived there. The bit about the two children was true, maybe not the ugly part but when you look at their parents...what hope did they have?
These days above all I write comic fantasies and spoofs of the whole ridiculous fantasy genre. You can find my feeble scribblings at futilefantasycreations.co.uk along with some textures for use with Poser or Daz.  There's a real terrible film we made on there too. Go see!
My Stats
D.O.B: 1st March 1971.
Hair: A distant memory.
Gender: Ugly man.
That's it. I've said too much.
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Comments (12)
Jaml
Dangerous ladies!!!!. Excellent!
Cimaira
Excellent pov and expressions! LOL, love the story, so glad to see you've made a full recovery. Good to see you again. Happy New Year to you too!
flavia49
Nice, very nice!
Dragonluna1
LMAO!! Excellent pic!!
DarqIce
Love the pic sweetie ! great work as always :-) try to keep the dying to 2 times this year will ya !!
miste1982
5*****
thekingtut Online Now!
I really like the look on the face of the lady on the left. It just screams "where the hell was she hiding that?"
Larion
Nice work!
kasalin
Lovely image, great scene, pose and a nice title.....excellent done !!! 5**
shorterbus
Crap, no nudity! What a waste of time.
KyotoDragon
Your note is a funny as the image!
LynLinz
A funny image - probably saw before, but still fun.