I Wish I Could Say Thank You by vaggabondd

Writers • Realism • posted on Jan 29, 2009

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Description

Tossing and turning On my favorite old bench I wonder the streets Looking for a few more penny presses To add another layer against the cold When a set of head lights Send me softly into the night I hear birds singing The sun is not so much light As it is warmth There are fields of corn On both sides of me Way off down the road I can see you waving to me You are young like when we first met When I lean my head back And take a big breath I can smell hot chicken And a peach pie You are wearing that big spring hat You love so much And that thin summer dress I love so much You are singing me home Then I can’t see you anymore And I can barely hear your voice Coming from underneath the willow tree Then you are gone altogether I can feel the cold Creeping back into my bones When I hear somebody say We got him back I wish I could say thank you I am not sure if I like this one or not, it might be a little to hokie pokie

Comments (8)

Wolfspirit

12:20AM | Thu, 29 January 2009

I like it, it is different, a different pov. Curious, what does hokie pokie mean? I do not know. I attempted to look it up. I could not find a definition for it anywhere… Please, share. Thanks Randy

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beachzz

2:16AM | Thu, 29 January 2009

Could be a movie--interesting idea!!

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auntietk

9:24AM | Thu, 29 January 2009

No, it's not hokey, it's very good. Beautifully clear imagery, good pacing ... nicely done!

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Alealonna

11:49AM | Thu, 29 January 2009

I adore it. It is different and I love different. It has two different moods, clashing together to make it amazing. You did a great job on this one.

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Merrylee

12:06PM | Thu, 29 January 2009

I agree with auntietk, it's not hokey at all...well done

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brycek

1:14PM | Thu, 29 January 2009

Very nice Randy!!

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hipps13

3:15PM | Thu, 29 January 2009

wonderful work, Randy warm hug, Linda

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flaviok

4:23PM | Thu, 05 February 2009

"Send me softly into the night I hear birds singing The sun is not so much light As it is warmth " Sensibilidade e alma, um poeta em sua essência, aplausos (5)