Dochtersions: Hello everybody! Under the name "dochtersions" I started, at the suggestion of my dear husband, in sharing my photos, fractals, and also some paintings, and other 2D art here at Renderosity. That was in January of 2010. I still use my two owls as avatar, which is a reduced image of one of my oil paintings.
The name "dochtersions" came into my head as only one, when I was looking for a name for my blog that I started in 2007.
This name is not that strange, as I know that God is my real father and mother at the same time, and I know that God loves me more and deeper than a man can aware of (or at least I think this way)
I live in the South of The Netherlands together with my retired husband. I've had various occupations. In my last job, I was working as an assistant to a paediatrician and a rehabilitation specialist. When I had children, I graduated "health awareness", and gave lectures on various topics, plus vegetarian cooking classes to teenagers.
My husband and I have together two daughters and four grandchildren. Which all live abroad, to be precise in Lacey (WA-USA) and Davos in Switzerland.
I've always been busy with all kinds of creativity. As a child I drew a lot, later pottery, needle art, tapestries, weaving, batik art, macramé, etc. Painting with oil was my last great hobby.
Around about the year 2000 I started having unexplained physical symptoms as well as insomnia, which was later diagnosed as having PTSD. It turned out that I had repressed a traumatized youth. However, the physical symptoms made that I no longer could be busy with my passions, the real painting, and other activities (f.e. reading books, gardening, travelling), which I was doing without a limit.
What I can stay doing well in limited form, is playing music on my mandolin and my guitar, and also to enjoy/listen my favourite music, which is including the cantatas of J.S. Bach and his sons , f.e. also music from G.F. Handel, G.Ph. Telemann, a.s.o. This is also the kind of music that my husband (on its church organ) and I (on my mandolin) play together.
After being diagnosed with PTSD a lot changed and I was forced to look for alternatives in which I could express myself. That is, that for years I started writing, and poetry, which go quite intense and as a sort of automatic. Unfortunately, my knowledge of the English language is not sufficient enough, so I write in my mother tongue, with sometimes a few exceptions. The thoughts come to my mind right at unexpected moments, and it’s wonderful, to surrendering to your train of thoughts.
In the encounter more and more of impossibilities, in connection with, f.e continuous pains, I learned to shift my gaze. Searching for distractions and alternatives, I learned to focus my happy mind on all the wonderful and admirable little things in the world around me.
My husband since 1968 Karel (kareldg on RR) bought a small pocket camera for me, and taught me to work with Fractal Explorer. Through my little Sony camera I learned to look differently, to see deeper; to see the details, the structure, how refined, and just so unique the small ones are in God's creation.
What is one of my daily tasks is trying to support people who suffer from PTSD, but they suffer more in an emotional way, and I can understand them and listen to their story (digital) they trust me.
Renderosity: What projects are you currently working on?
Dochtersions: Of course I would love to take more concrete technical knowledge to me (to acquire), and follow tutorials, how to work with Ultra Fractal, Mandelbulb, etc.. The capabilities of PSP investigate and experiment with it.
The manual of my current camera (Canon PowerShot SX50HS, and as pocket camera Panasonic DMC-TZ35, since 2020 I use a Canon PowerShot SX70HS). I would like to sift through, and experiment with it. But exactly that kind of things, such as reading comprehension, concentration, makes this especially, by the constant dominating intense facial pain, really impossible.
All in all, I continue to look for improvement, while in the meantime trying to be light-hearted, happy and hopeful, to be open to everything that's coming my way. I enjoy art, stay in the nature, the outer man/woman in me, the love that I've been given, to realize this, and to be thankful for. Wherever I am happy with is that I am able to meet so many lovely people through RR. Unfortunately, only digital, but I'm also grateful.
Hover over top left image to zoom.
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Comments (38)
adrie
Beautiful colord fractal artwork Mies, excellent done.
gemb1
Sharing good or bad things helps in many ways. I am honored that you have chosen us to share with an excellent image and words. Remember you now have a world wide community of caring people. I can't speak for the rest of the community, but in the US there is at least one person that is always ready to listen and help.
evinrude
That is pretty intense. Well done!!!
Glendaw
What a powerful image. The ripple of colors are amazing. The black eye is very disturbing and the painted pic behind it claims the unsettled thoughts and dark image of the past. Thanks for sharing your inner thoughts and torments of childhood hell. Mies your coping skills are outstanding,you have come along way. P.T.S.D. often makes one a vicim all over again. Your new skills of daily living hopefully helps to overcome the evil past and slay the awfull dragon.
densa
wonderful art
emmecielle
Sorry to hear about your sad childhood. I hope that now your life is more peaceful and less painful! A big hug! :)
danapommet
I see the evil eye and it looks like a rooster but the lase and color cover up the evil spirit. Dana
cannonn
you are making a world of off human