People are funny creatures and we tend to over simplify what can be very complicated social concepts. For example--guy see girl with an ass, assumes she likes this kind of treatment "Ergo, women must like assholes". Thus a myth spreads. But is the end result of this relationship really saying all about the supposed phenomenon. Not even a little bit. I for one married a wonderful man, and although we have had ups and downs, he has proven himself to be a man of character, dignity and love. Besides, once it was revealed to me, in the dating process, that a man was a jerk, I dropped him flat. I have also met many women who like me, have wonderful husbands at their sides. Since so many women are involved in healthy and loving relationships , this would mean that NOT ALL women like assholes. But to that end--does this mean that the women who are currently with a jerk wanted to be in that situation? Not at all, in fact, I am more than sure that said undesirable male did not come up to his lady love and punch her in the face on the first date. Many of these men pay close attention to the desires and wants of their prey--and become the very thing these women desire--initially. If she digs cars he will be a car nut for example. It isn't until he feels he "has her hooked" that he plays the asshole card--and the woman, thus confused, may spend a great majority of the relationship trying to regain the man she fell in love with. The convulsions of her attempt can often be played out publicly and thereby she looks the part of the fool and he the ass. The myth solidifies So when you look at this, it wasn't the asshole part of the guy that she was attracted to, but the sweet kind and genteel side he showed in the beginning. Thus this destroys the idea that women (caveat, mentally HEALTHY women) like assholes. And in many of these scenarios, the woman eventually wises up and leaves (not all sadly)... But Alicia, you say, I am a nice guy and I can't get laid--I mean, a date. Maybe the issue is your goal is only on getting laid...? Besides, I knew a guy who was great with the ladies--AND a nice guy. When asked his secret he revealed, "I just do what the assholes do, I display confidence, I listen, I make her laugh--we have fun--I just leave the jerk part out." To that end, the man had long lasting and satisfying relationships, none of them ended with the woman thinking he was an ass. For example, one girl simply had to go out of state to college...they decided not to have a long distance relationship. She left with his blessing and they remain casual friends. To date, dude is happily married. I think nice guys who do not have the gumption to be social and engaging started this myth. It was kinda like, meh, she didn't pick me she picked him--he was a jerk, so she deserved it, nanny nanny boo boo." But we do not have this mentality when guys are wronged by women. We understand he was victimized. "Well, why do I have to be engaging can't she just like me even if I have the personality of dishwater?" nice guys asks--and thereby his problem. I mean dude, I can be bored and alone at home. Would guy or girl desire to sit across the table talking a wet mop? No. we want socially engaging, interesting partners. Nice is but one on a long list of attributes that make for a long lasting, mutually fulfilling relationship. This doesn't mean one puts on false fronts--rather highlight your own personal interest and find a girl who also shares this interest--this shared interest may not end in marriage but could be the start of something fun and mutually beneficial... **** Nice guys do not finish last--nice guys finish BEST!