I sat on the windowsill watching the snow fall, slowly drifting down against the grey sky, landing on our back garden and submerging what little green was left in a blanket of pure white. We had planned to go into town and have a day alone but the world had other plans contrary to our best hopes as I sat hypnotised by the world in motion, intoxicated so much so that I barely noticed the doorway open as mum came in bearing a warm gift. "Get it while it's hot Savena" her soft voice broke my trance with the world beyond my window as mum offered me a mug of hot chocolate with her softest voice offset by her warmest smile as she caught sight of the snow falling. "Thanks mum" I whispered to her as she slowly perched herself down beside me and looked outside "Guess we aren't going anywhere today kiddo" her voice still soft but now with a faint hint of sorrow "It's okay mum" I paused and looked at the faint disheartened glimmer in her eye "We could try again next weekend?" Mum snapped her sorrow away and nodded gently "Sounds good to me Savena" Mum fell silent for a brief moment, there was something within her that seemed neither displeased nor unhappy but more disenchanted as a strangely soft smile crept on her face "We could just make the most of today?" Her softest voice teasing me to look upon her as she quietly sipped away and in kind I took a first sip, my best attempts could not have masked the delight that first drop of velvety cocoa sent racing through my tongue and my heart alike as a gentle smile crept on my lips, mum smiled "It's good isn't it?" I nodded without thought as she gently rested beside me. The strange smile on mum's face rose again as she looked out upon the whitening world and softly spoke "I remember the last time this happened, they said it wouldn't last, but they were wrong, within two days you couldn't even see the roads outside, just the top floors houses rising from an island of white snow. Me and Evelyn spent a week trapped in this house, with no power or heating, we sheltered in the back room with all the blankets we could find and a camping stove for heat" Mum almost slipped into a strange trance as she continued the story which clearly still warmed her heart to this very day "I remember all the strange games we played, games she invented to keep us busy whilst we shivered away, I don't know how that time seemed to pass so quickly and for weeks they talked about nothing else on the news" mum paused and chuckled "The winter storm of a lifetime" she eased down "Shows what they know!" I listened to her words like gospel but couldn't help but ask "Do you miss her?" Mum looked at me slightly surprised and sighed "Of course I miss her, she is magnificent and I am thankful everyday that for some reason our paths crossed" she paused and glanced at me, edging closer "But, we had reached the time where we both needed to go our own ways, we needed to make our own lives separately from each other and I still see her most days, but yes I miss Evelyn" mum gently reached for me "More importantly though Savena" she softly uttered as she pulled me closer "I might have lost her but I gained something that I cherish more and more every single day" gently dragging me backwards into the warmest embrace I had come to know. As mum pulled me into her I felt myself easing back and resting against her as she continued "What I gained was watching something so incredible that everyday I have to pinch myself to believe that it could be true that I have been lucky enough to watch it happen" mum slowly wrapped her arms around me "They all said it would be hard and at times I would question whether it was the right decision" mum paused and chuckled "What did they know!" I glanced up and uttered "Have you ever wondered?" mum giggled and took a sip of her drink "Not once" she gently smiled "Life did change, but just not how they said it would, it didn't really change it just became?" she paused with a wry smile and tickled my belly and as I squirmed in the safety of her warm hands she grinned "It became different" she ceased her torment and gripped me tighter "Life stopped being about me and what I needed, without thought it became about us and what we needed" she paused and smiled softly and looked into my eyes with her soft purple eyes willing me to listen "and most importantly what you needed" she squeezed me tighter and giggled "That became all that mattered" I felt her warmth as she held onto me and cocoa teased my throat as I probed "What about Jan?" mum briefly cackled "That dick all but killed himself the second he called you "My Baggage" he might as well have just buried himself in my garden the second that those words left his lips" mum glanced at me wryly "Come on Savena, I know what you want to ask next!" I felt my cheeks glow as I shyly muttered "What about Kazuki?" mum rolled her eyes "Why do you think I have a crush on him?" I shrugged nervously as she threatened to tickle me again but instead just chuckled "At least he gets it" "Get's what?" I quizzed as mum sighed "How your world changes when you have children and what it's like to do it alone with everyone thinking that they can judge your every decision" I looked at her slightly taken aback "For some people nothing I ever do will be good enough, but they don't matter, they can thinks what they want but they don't matter" mum looked down at me gently "The only thing that matters is you and as long as in your eyes I do enough for you, then I am happy for other people to think whatever bullshit they wish" Mum settled down and looked out into the garden and squished me gently "Do you know what I truly gained when you came into my life Savena?" I looked up and shook my head gently as her strange smile softened "I got to watch a girl that used to hide under the bed in the Davizioso and watch her grow into a strong and confident girl. A strong girl that now is finding her own way in Ljianstipol, I get to watch her flourish and find friends around her, friends I have come to adore just as much as I do you, Yui, Lavender and even Paisley" I looked at mum slightly surprised "I thought you didn't like Paisley?" mum gently giggled "She's pretty full on but I like her" mum gently paused and took a sip of her drink "Everyday I get to watch you grow and find new parts of yourself, things that just make you more than you have ever been, whether it's a new style all of your own or even something that I already knew was there, it makes me so proud all the same, so let it snow, because right now Savena" Mum paused and pulled me tightly "Where else have I got all that I could ever want or need?" I sat quietly absorbing the warmth echoing from mum's voice and her embrace holding me firmly against herself as together we both watched the snow fall, both hoping and wishing for the same thing as I uttered "Me too mum, but has it been hard sometimes?" she snuggled her head onto my hair "It was hard when you first came home, you were so nervous and when you couldn't talk too, that was tough, but then I guess it must have been just as hard for you too" she glanced to the sky as I sighed "It was, but I had you to help me mum" she smiled gently "I remember the first time you ever called me that, do you remember it?" she waited for me to reply but instead I just listened to her "When we had to go to Usted for all those tests and checks to prove who you are and where you came from, that day was horrible, for both of us, all those tests and checks, just to prove what we both already knew. I had never, ever asked you to call me "mum" but that day on the journey back home, you rested beside, just like you are now and you just whispered "Thank you mum" Mum fell silent for a brief moment, as I looked up I could see her welling up, I reached up and cupped her hand. Mum smiled gently as she squeezed my hand "I had never been so humbled or proud and all the hardest moments we had shared, didn't matter anymore" I joined mum in welling up and pushed myself back into her body, took her hands and wrapped her arms round me and whispered to her "Let it snow mum"