This Quiz will count for 33% of your final grade. 1. If you were forced to ponder, would you: (a) perspire (b) pontificate (c) tilt backwards 2. At the end of the work day, is your fragmentaion complete? 3. When opposites attract, do you find that repellant? 4. If marriage is a nitemare, what type of saddle do you use? 5. In a meeting of the minds, do the bodies just stand there? 6. After considering all the options, do you choose the one with the least cheese? 7. If you work for the government, have you ever been guilty of provoking humor? If so, are you contrite? Why not? 8. If you are "God's gift to women" How should they unwrap you? ......be concise 9. Would you burn your draft card if it was printed on a hundred dollar bill? 10. When might makes right, does right moan and sigh with passion? 11. If you need to mend your ways, should you take them off first? 12. Explain three major differences between the here and now? 13. If an explanation is due, when is dew an explanation? 14. Without giving regard to the options, refute equilibrium. 15. True or False? 16. Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? ....be delicate 17. Scotch, why not? .........be precise 18. What would you use a meta metaphor for? Why? 19. How would you dispose of (a) Irreverent buffoons.......be gentle (b) Windows 98................no vulgarity (c) Your Mother in Law.....be brutal 20. Which do you consider were more alike, Ishtar or Gigli, or vice versa? ......be brief 21. Give the date of at least 2 of the following (a) Plutarch (b) December 7, 1942 22. What is a Bugatti Royale? Do you agree? 23. Stigmatize cursorily (a) Ambidextrous vegetarians (b) Bambi 24. Conjugate briefly Romeo and Juliet. 25. Sketch vaguely, with some reference to the facts (a) Murphy's Law (b) Victoria's known facts 26. "East is East and West is West" Digress with great ineptitude and eloquence. 27. With great agitation describe the effects of broccoli upon the number 17. You may use graphs. 28. Lawyers, fact or fiction? ........be decisive 29. Multiple choice (1a) (2c) 30. Do not draw a map of the battle of the sexes. But describe in abbreviated jargon the effects of submissive deliberation upon the perceived outcome. ......be obtuse. 31. Did Pike peak? If not, why not? 32. In 3,000 words (exactly) define post-modern primitivism, as it interacts with the theory of relativity as interpreted by a society comprised of left-handed red-heads with an aversion to Albanian Psychiatrists that espouse Tolstoy. (use only one side of the paper) ****************************************************** Rules: 1. Do not attempt to answer more than one question at a time. 2. For those over 50, you do not need to answer questions 86 thru 100. 3. Try to color within the lines. Personal Section: 1. Do you know who you are? 1b. Why not? 2. Do you know why you are? 2b. Have you been analyised for this? 3. How are you? 3g. Are you sure? 3a. Really? 4. Why are you taking this test? 4i. That's not a real reason....refute. 5. It was you who did it, don't deny it. 5a. We know you did it. 5b. Admit it now. 5c. The sheep saw you do it. 5d. You'll feel better after you confess. 5e. Really. ****************************************** I plagarized the hell out of "1066 and All That" Sorry