well, you can start by making the touruses smaller and try to use a pyrocluster for the texture of them. same for the cylandar. try to take out the light or sut or whatever you want to call it and placing an object in instead. leave the small planes though. and dont change the texture or material on them at all. the bullet. leave the same material on the bullet. but try to shape it more like an actual bullet. just use the polygon tool and throw the "bullet" object into a hyper nurbs. anyways just suggestions take it or leave it. but its good for beginners work. if you ever would like any more suggestions or help i put my e-mail adress in your guestbook.

Since ordinary bullets will never break the light (not unless they are made of glass... haha...) before dismantling themselves completely long before, this is clearly fictional. Since it is fictional, I can not really judge its execution on a rational basis. Judged as a fictional scene however, Id say it needs work. In all other points, I agree with vendegna.

it's ok

I think, being that you are 14, your doing a dang good job. Really impressed with your creativity. Keep up the great work