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Divided

Writers People posted on Jan 11, 2004
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Description


As we walk along Now on separate paths It's hard to believe that once we were side by side Hand in Hand Meant to Be With no reason to believe it would not last. I clearly remember a day when yours was the face I saw on the pillow next to mine When your shy foot moved to secretively touch mine under the covers at night Snuggled close, and comfortable for the first time ever Sleeping in the arms of someone without desire for space Sweet breathe to caress soft, bare skin Do you remember the day we came to that wall which divided us? So hazy a line we crossed, Did you even realize that was The End? If I had, I would have fought harder. Harder than I have. Is that possible? And now, here we are Alone, Separate, Divided Empty pillows on the bed, cold feet helped you run No one to hold. The only breathe you feel is that of the cold winter wind Time to move on Leave your time to the Black and white memories which will cloud your mind On lonely days as we walk along Now on separate paths Struggling with the notion that we were so obviously Meant to Be... But now we know, so obviously, that it could never last

Comments (2)


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pwason

5:48PM | Sun, 11 January 2004

It always amazes me how well you can write on your emotions. Although there are less comments in here, I think that a great deal is because many people relate in such a sensitive way that it's hard to comment on it. It hits a beat in their heart like it does with you. You are a great writer...don't stop.

tjames

2:02AM | Wed, 14 January 2004

I think the oeder of s2 and s3 should ve switched(s3 has a higher priority) In your conclusion your last two lines need work I can't help you here. Its a tough furrow that isn't going to give up easily because I see you really stuck there. Take heart I've gone over my writing many times and when I posted it still had it torn apart. If a piece is commented on and the words actually are considered, it's because the piece has merit. No response is death. What good is a work wirhout readers.


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