Random Thoughts Put Together by FlutterbyeJo
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Description
There are many times
in life's long haul
when thoughts and feelings
trip you to fall.
The events that make us
the people we are
can cause us to wonder
and push us to far.
When left small and lonely
we set our mind free
our thoughts loose to ponder
we're forced to see...
the people we are,
the place we could be,
we can make ourselves stronger
by looking inside Me.
Not one of my strongest poems but I thought I'd share it anyway, Jo x
Comments (5)
meico
It's certainly true that adversity causes us to examine our situations more carefully ... and that in the inevitable search for solutions we should not neglect the healing power of introspection - for the answer to the problem is more often than not inside ourselves. Whilst there is room for 'tweaking' this poem, the possible tweaks are relatively minor and confined to the last stanza eg the final line would scan better it was one syllable less, and somehow 'Me' has to be reconciled with the preceding repeated 'we'. The most important thing is that the poem has a clear message and it is articulated well.
FlutterbyeJo
Hey Meico, I have to agree I had a lot of problems with the last stanza and the syllables throughout the whole thing, although a lot of them I managed to resolve, some I didn't, maybe I'll rewrite it and see if I can do a better job!! Jo x
Banky615
This has certainly come from deep inside. I believe you can become whatever you desire ;)
roadrunner69
In my own style, "I likes it!"
Wolfspirit
Yes, I enjoyed this one too.