I have no words of wisdom (most days I'm not fit company for myself - WINK). PEACE to you.

ouch, very ouch..;) a man with a hobby is many a woman's curse..;) I get the same thing from my missus about 'rosity..;)

splendid picture and text!!! .. I like it very much

Also I am not in mood for company, you espress very well , that is good description of me, so what can I say? Eccellent*'Lina

sorry. 's pretty strong. any other comments this calls up in my heart are all kinda harsh, so i'll keep them to myself.

You obviously have a good sense of poetry and emotions. While not butting in to your personal life I would just have to say that all of those things have been said about me by my wife as well. Great looking Tele, I'm jealous. Usually my wife won't even let me plug in my old 87 Peavey, can't stand the "noise"!

seriously, it's not even about the music -- that I encourage, but when he gets grumpy and/or depressed he gets very verbally nasty and it's hard to take, especially right now since I've got my own stuff to deal with re: my Mom dying this month...

Cara-Mae: if you're not happy girl, you're just not happy! It's really that simple. It doesn't matter what these other men hear from their wives, because their wives are not you! The main piece of advice I can give is that you don't make any major decisions right now while you are dealing with the immediate loss of your mother. You may find when you look back in time that everything is actually "amplified" right now (pardon the pun!) because of the day-to-day pain you are dealing with. Give it time; ask him to show a little grace, patience and empathy; and if he can't be supportive, then get yourself the space and support that you need elsewhere. Ask someone for help - and if the first person you ask doesn't give you help, then keep asking people until you get what you need. And purge here as much as you like! hugz to you!

hugs You put into words something that I also feel and can relate to so awesomely well. I can empathise with what you are trying to say. It is always the hardest when you find support and understanding lacking from the person you believe in the most, especially when they do not focus on you even a little.

Cara-Mae, I agree with much of what Auspoet has said here and I would like to add, I am sure your husband hurts too in his own way, we all handle pain differently. This may just be his way as ugly as it may feel or look to you right now... As an added thought to share a bit of my own experiences with you, I have felt the pain in which you feel right now from the one you love as in spouse not taking notice when your in need, and I too at the time thought all the thoughts you have put up here in textbut later on when I had a bit more time to look back in retrospect and try to see things through his eyes, what I saw was just as heartbreaking to me as what was seen then was a man who wanted to take away the pain I felt from my losses of loved ones I had lost. But just as I felt helpless at my mothers side when she passed away, he to felt helpless at mine and that is a horrid pain as you know and anyhow yes he desired to make all right for me, but that is one thing he could not do, so this double pain in him took on the ugliest form of all just like which you speak of above my heart broke for him, when I looked at it as soand then it was easier to understand, and accept as talk about with him not placing any extra weight on him, letting him know I hurt and there is nothing he can do to stop that pain, but it sure would be nice if occasionally in his own time when he chose it he could come and hold me.And he did when he felt he could and your husband may handle it this way too if approached as such, but still Cara-Mae I received all that ugliness as you have, and it may continue to for a bit, I believe in the long run you will be ok you and him will, there is love there I know it, because after allthe anger is actually a form and expression of pain and this pain I feel comes from love. In addition, I do not know your entire situation, as I don't know him, so this is all I can really say considering what I do know just from living and experiencing similar situations as life myself Also as Auspoet has said get some outside support and do the best you can giving a bit of time for healing for the both of you , and as done here if you just need to let go in words, then yes do so, I find it does helpHugs on this end also.

i know all of those posting here are trying to be supportive and kind, but having been privvy to this situation since, i don't know, forever, we both know this is not something new or something stemming solely from mom hackett's death. this comes from him and it always has. i'm still in shock about the proverbial mud he slung your way yesterday. anyways, you know mikey, j, laura, ryan and i are always here. we've been your support lattice forever, so why would that change now? it would just be nice if your husband could be a part of that as well. hugs poops. :)

Cara-Mae - I went through something like this awhile ago when my hubby and I were going to get a divorce. I know it's hard. Get some time to yourself, I know it helped me. Just go for a walk, go to the store whatever it takes. I know that anger and pain goes from person to person and you guys may or may not be sharing the pain (it was like that in my situation) Talking very calm and understanding both sides is all I can say.....now, go get yourself some coffee and some chocolate :)

You've written a very expressive poem here. Through your words I can feel your frustration, pain and anger. I don't know your relationship so I cannot give advice here. But I hope things work out for the best.

Cara very emotional expressions, everyone has spoken of their own situations that are similar to yours but remember one thing you and you alone is the only one who really knows your situation so you and you alone must decide what or what not to do. Your in to much pain to make a clear decision think about NOT thinking about it, it does work crazy as it may seem. but in the end make your decisions what you and you alone want to do or change. God Bless either way any decision is a hard one to face so follow your heart Hugs:))

thanks everyone

p.s. things are getting better