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Poser - OFFICIAL F.A.Q (Last Updated: 2024 Sep 19 6:38 pm)



Subject: In the Year 2028...


JohnRender ( ) posted Wed, 06 August 2003 at 12:57 PM · edited Thu, 19 September 2024 at 6:34 PM

It's 25 years from now... what advances will we see? Computers will run at terahertz speeds (thousands of gigahertz), hard drives will be thousands of gigahertz as well. Keyboards and mice were replaced long ago, first with voice-command interfaces, then with thought-controlled interfaces. Sure, some people will still use the mouse as a "tactile" way to "connect with the computer". DAZ and Curious Labs will enjoy a healthy competition: hobbyists will still be using DAZ Studio because they still feel burned about Curious Labs' Poser 5 (even though it was way back in 2002). But, major studios will finally be using Poser for such films as Terminator 8, X-Men 10, and Friday the 13th: The Absoulute, Really, Final Friday. Figures and models will be measured in millions of polygons and "low res" texture maps will be a lowly 10,000 x 10,000 pixels. Most "high-res" textures will be well over 50,000 pixels in size! Computer-generated images will see an almost "reversal" in quality: people are so used to the photographic quality, that many images have "defects" to almost prove that it was computer-generated. Historical side-note: this follows the famous "CGI Photo" scandal of 2022 where a computer-generated image was entered in a holographic photography contest and took first place. Renderosity would have seen their one millionth member join... if they hadn't been bought up by America's Microsoft in 2018 and merged into Earth Online. (America Online/ Time Warner merged with Microsoft in 2016 and quickly bought up Exxon/ Mobil and the Disney Corporation, making themselves the largest corporation known to man. Their flagship product, "Earth Online" combines the products that were once known as "America Online" and "Windows" into one, bloated operating system, requiring 20G of hard drive space and 5G of memory to run.) In hindsight, this was a good thing for Renderosity. Their membership had been slowly disappearing to other sites as more people complained that images on Renderosity were too "racy"... eventually, people complained that the words "for sale" and "banner ad" were too much for their eyes and ears. Consequently, a site-wide witchhunt began for any merchants who used the word "product" or "Marketplace". Althougth morally proud of themselves for only providing free items, the site eventually considered themselves lucky when they were bought up... without income from merchants' products, the site would have gone bankrupt within a few months. And, yes, people will still be asking why they can't render a Poser 10 image on their Windows 98 machine. When asked why they hadn't upgraded in 30 years, most respondents said, "I just paid $499 for DAZ's Triple Titanium Club and $399 for Curious Lab's Super-Duper-Club. And you expect me to give my hard-earned twenty bucks to the 'evil empire' to purchase an upgrade that spies on me?? I don't think so."


Spit ( ) posted Wed, 06 August 2003 at 3:01 PM

LOL You mean you missed the big buyout? in 2008 RDNA bought DAZ. :)))))))))


dialyn ( ) posted Wed, 06 August 2003 at 3:27 PM

Oh, good. I died in 2027...I was afraid I missed the buyout.


Penguinisto ( ) posted Wed, 06 August 2003 at 5:13 PM

No? My Bad :) Of course there will only be a Windows .NET version - if you get caught running any other operating system (and heaven forbid run anything w/o DRM), you'll be dragged off to be 're-educated' in a system of labor camps, revealed in the upcoming bestseller "The Penguin Archipelago" DAZ on the other hand will prolly buy the entire continent of Antarctica, so that they can launch research into Vicctoria 23.4, complete with 2.8 million polys and a handy DAZ Studio plug-in so that it will work with Discreet Labs' upcoming "Bot-o-Matic '29" that will turn your Vicky into a living, breathing (and did I mention visually pleasing?) android. Me, I'll just be a dirty old man. >:) /P


wolf359 ( ) posted Wed, 06 August 2003 at 6:19 PM

.... and some mac OS 9 diehards will stil be bitching that none of the new apple HOLODECK software will run in classic mode. :-/



My website

YouTube Channel



lelionx ( ) posted Wed, 06 August 2003 at 7:08 PM

and a loaf of bread will cost $5,000.00


Netherworks ( ) posted Wed, 06 August 2003 at 7:31 PM

Aye, everyone will have smart-sunglasses, with a pop-up hud interface. Though you'll have voice activation for the interface, in crowded areas you'll have to type commands with your eyelashes. A few years back I watched "Demolition Man" and thought it was silly (but fun). I watched it the other day and in some parts, said "yup, that'll probably happen". Every restaurant is Taco Bell - ROFL. I wonder how many fines I'll rack up by cursing in public.

.


LordNakagawa ( ) posted Wed, 06 August 2003 at 9:04 PM

In 2028 Poser again changes hands, once owned by by software/perfume/electic razor giant NorelCoCorel is bought out by SCO, whoch bought out by Dodge, which bought by MiniMicrosoft whcih was recently boughtout by Taco Bell for thw grand price of two enchilatas and a Burito Supreme. Poser users hope that the long awaited service patch #586 to version 5 will be available....


compiler ( ) posted Thu, 07 August 2003 at 5:43 AM

Georges Bush III will be supreme emperor of the world, with old Bill Gates as his prime minister. People not able to earn a living will have to sell their childrens to megacorporations for a life of servitude, just to make sure they can eat everyday. Some parents will give their children the brand name of a corporation so that these firms will pay for their studies. And the most succesful product in the MP ever will be the voice activated Vickie VI, who obeys your every command, dresses herself in fetish gear and accept anything your wife doesn't. The full interaction suit will be issued: stay in touch with people you meet in the messageries ! Experience safe bodyly relations ! Buy Lab Avatar V to give you better virtual looks ! (Only for windows 2028). That's the world we will give to our children. (shivers)


JohnRender ( ) posted Thu, 07 August 2003 at 8:23 AM

But how do I get Bot-O-Matic and Lab Avatar V to work properly on my Windows 98 machine? They keep locking up and forcing me to reboot.


PilotHigh ( ) posted Thu, 07 August 2003 at 11:41 AM

Check CL website. Also see later post.


kupa ( ) posted Thu, 07 August 2003 at 11:56 AM

...the only people still buying aluminum foil will be the fringe Linux users of 2003 who fashion it into a hat in a feeble attempt to keep the NSA/Gatesian/alien hordes from probing their cranium...


CrystalDragon ( ) posted Thu, 07 August 2003 at 7:01 PM

...and later tonight we have a preview of the upcomming movie: Rocky Five...... Thousand! ~DM


Penguinisto ( ) posted Thu, 07 August 2003 at 7:23 PM

Au Contraire, Oh Meek and Servile Win32 Bourgeois Slave... In fact, we will look quite normal during the day, and you will not know us from the rest of the suffering Proletariat. At night, we will keep our secret network alive with the exchange of messages passed around in virus form, naturally done unwittingly by Outlook Express .NET v34.6 users everywhere. We will quietly infiltrate the halls of those corrupted .NET pigs, and gather our weapons and troops. They will never think of us as anything more than Win32 slaves to be used and abused, and our lips shall sing their praises even as our hearts damn them to Hell. At the precise time, and at our greatest strength, we shall rise up! We shall roar with a single mighty voice, and we storm the gates of Microsoft. We shall throw down the chains of computerdom's cruel masters, and free the millions of Win128 slaves everywhere, opening their eyes to a new dawn of free computing! ...and once we're done with that, we'll all go down to the Redmond Acres Cemetary, break out a few shovels, and line up for miles just to piss on Bill Gates' by-then rotting corpse. >:) /P


cooler ( ) posted Thu, 07 August 2003 at 7:37 PM

file_70328.jpg

Yes Pengy... tinfoil hats :-)


kupa ( ) posted Thu, 07 August 2003 at 8:45 PM

...and I wonder why I stayed away for so long... :)


hauksdottir ( ) posted Thu, 07 August 2003 at 10:05 PM

Steve, Remember that interview 3-4 years back (it may have been just after the start of CuriousLabs), where a nice sleek Mac was at your elbow in the accompanying image? If you'd stayed with the Mac, you'd have avoided a lot of grief... these PC-users are a noisy, confused, bunch made angrier because they wrestle with an unstable OS which crashes daily (if not more often). Mac artists are intelligent, good-looking, and pleasant to be around. We don't resemble our pets, we resemble our computers! ;^) Carolly


kupa ( ) posted Thu, 07 August 2003 at 10:49 PM

Carolly, Yes mom... I know mom.... I'm sorry mom... Can I borrow the car tonight mom? - typed with a wicked smirk, hoping you won't hit me next time you see me- ;-)


hauksdottir ( ) posted Fri, 08 August 2003 at 1:06 AM

I won't hit you... you might enjoy it. Besides, you know too much about pyrotechnics. There was supposed to be a big show down in Santa Clara... did you help with the arming of the "artillery". (I don't know what you guys call that stand with the rockets aimed, timed, and ready to launch.) Carolly


xvcoffee ( ) posted Fri, 08 August 2003 at 4:11 AM

In 25 years In 25 days

LINUX 95

Itll have been a long time coming but lookout all you Mac an windows diehards when it does.


Penguinisto ( ) posted Fri, 08 August 2003 at 8:21 AM

Carolly: we already know about the Mac users ;) And yeah, Windoze is unstable - can't stand it, which is why I'm screaming for a Linux version of Poser (or better yet, DAZ|Studio - I'm not picky.) Me, I'm glad Apple finally got some sense and copied-up themselves a BSD Unix-based core - now if they can just bring the price of their hardware down to something a man can actually afford without taking out a loan... they'd be perfect. Cooler: The chick under the hat isn't cute enough to let anywhere near a bash prompt... :p /P


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