Slip into your world of stone
In it you'll find your all alone
Stand and face that tough stone wall
as you climb , you start to crawl

My heart is aching
My screams are breaking
The silence is broken
nothing left for me
Just leave me here ,
you cant save me i'm too far gone

Jagged stones burn your lies
over the wall you hear your cries
look back, and see stone grey
fall to your knees , as your mind slips away

I let go finally
All that's left is tears ,
for all eternity
Place me in a distant memory
Place me somewhere, where you can't see
all that's here what's left of me
you can't save me i'm too far gone

People laugh , as you start to cry
how could you let your life slip you by?
I'm so hurt, I'm so broken, I'm torn apart
No words Unspoken
you can't save me
I'm too far gone.
Copyright 2003 Erica Sanders

Aside from a few grammar errors - missing apostrophes - the poem reads quite well. The words flow together and form images in my mind. The poem reminds me of the Beatle's song "A Day in the Life" in that the stanzas are well done, but I feel like I'm reading 2 poems shuffled together like 2 decks of cards with different colored backs. I'm a literal person, so it's quite possible that I'm missing a connection or you mean the pieces to be slightly scattered to emphasize the madness. I'm not sure why, but the last line of stanza 1 is my favorite line of the poem. It creates an interesting juxtaposition that I'd never realized before - the idea of climbing (which is done to gain height) by crawling upward (though crawling is usually done to stay close to the ground, not to rise.) Thanks for sharing. It definitely brought a few new ideas to mind. Cres

crescent: Thanks so much for your comments on my poem:) actually, it is interesting that you say that because the poem started out as two. I combined them to make them more lyrical in a sense. i am hoping to one day record it as a song . but thanks again for your opinion on it. - the true trinity -

Yeah, I already read it but I still enjoy reading it again. Keep on your good work :)

much apreciated (i'm not one for spelling things right at all) i like the wording, very strong emotional verses. i hope you aren't beyond saving because i wud like to read some more poems from you. ste