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Subject: I'm back...


bandolin ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 10:52 AM · edited Thu, 28 November 2024 at 5:21 AM

Just letting you guys know that I'm back from the hospital. My surgery went very well and I'm now recovering at home with 31 staples in my abdomen and a stack of morphine pills. The problem with mophine is, its great for pain relief but causes constipation. I went 8 days w/o a single bowel movement, and my intestines felt they were going to burst. I tried everything from off the shelf laxatives, metamucil, stewed prunes, prescription laxatives; nothing worked. So I figured I was trying to solve the problem from the wrong end. Yesterday, my wife gave me an enema. Who ever said an enema is painless, clearly never had one before. Anyway it did the trick (the hounds have been released!). Talk about being violated. Now I know what it must be like being a pretty boy in prison. On a lighter note, I finally tamed my brand new PC, I've got Bryce loaded and I'm ready go. Eeeehaaa! Thank you all for your well wishes and prayers, they worked. Curtis


<strong>bandolin</strong><br />
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Ang25 ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 11:06 AM

:-D I'm so glad to hear you're back! and that everything is coming out just fine ;P Its good to have humor like yours! Wishing you well and a speedy recovery.


draculaz ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 11:29 AM

LMAO! you scarred us for life with that descriptive visual ;) good to hear you're doing better though. good health and... less enemas in the future :D drac (God i'm glad i don't have a wife) ((although i had just the perfect laxative))


Sambucus ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 12:26 PM

Ah god, I was just going to have dinner! Glad it went well, tho,:o)


sackrat ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 12:36 PM

Welcome back,.........try a stool softener,....generally best when taken with or just after taking the morphine.

"Any club that would have me as a member is probably not worth joining" -Groucho Marx


Quest ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 1:44 PM

This is something, as early as this morning I was wondering how you were doing and here it is a few hours later with your wonderful news. Very glad to hear youve come through the surgery well. Enemas, Ive never had one but could imagine the discomfort associated with it. And to think, some people do them regularly whether they need it or notLOL! Generally speaking, it certainly gives the wife a chance to get even for certain inequities and trespasses if theyre so inclined. So, it sounds like we should be expecting some Brycen out of you, would be interesting to see what comes from those morphine induced dreams. Well, best wishes in a speedy recovery.


Nukeboy ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 1:45 PM

Got bad news for you... when you detox from morphine (or heroin) you get the opposite effect! From both ends, I might add, so good reason to go very lightly on that stuff! Glad you're back.


Lucifer_The_Dark ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 1:55 PM · edited Fri, 18 February 2005 at 1:56 PM

Sugar free mints or something with Sorbitol as an ingredient will get you going sooner than any other expensive treatment. ps glad to hear you're ok :D

Message edited on: 02/18/2005 13:56

Windows 7 64Bit
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danamo ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 2:54 PM

Welcome back from the Hospital! I wish you a speedy recovery. I'm glad that everything came out all right in the end.


bandolin ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 3:05 PM

Funny, no matter how many people I talk to about constipation, everyone has a unique remedy. Its kinda like hangovers. Everyone's got a secret formula, and none of them are pleasant. As for morphine addiction, I'm only allowed 2 mg per day. And I don't have an addictive bone in my body. Being dependant on a substance is abhorrent to me. Besides I have my wife and kids as a reality check.


<strong>bandolin</strong><br />
[Former 3DS Max forum coordinator]<br />
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GROINGRINDER ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 3:40 PM

Welcome back and get well soon.


TheBryster ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 4:03 PM
Forum Moderator

Trouble with enemas, they're a pain in the arse.... Welcome back! Get well soon.

Available on Amazon for the Kindle E-Reader

All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster


And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...


RodsArt ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 4:14 PM

Glad to hear you've come through the operation A-O-K, and still typing with Bryce on the brain. As for the rest....I've spent the last 3 weeks on muscle relaxers & pain meds. I fear my LAX of constipation is nearing the END when I stop taking them. WB Curtis ICM Rod

___
Ockham's razor- It's that simple


Quest ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 4:50 PM

LOL@Bryster! No pun intended huh?


TheBryster ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 7:42 PM
Forum Moderator

You mean like....'Enemas...they're a bummer' ?

Available on Amazon for the Kindle E-Reader

All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster


And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...


Ardiva ( ) posted Fri, 18 February 2005 at 9:37 PM

Glad you're ok, bandolin and I'm certainly glad I had time to digest my dinner before I read this! lol ps..if you have any leftover morphine..would ya pass 'em over to me please? My back has been killing me the last two days! :)



Zhann ( ) posted Sat, 19 February 2005 at 1:17 AM

Waaaaaaaaaayyy more information than we need, just to know you're back at home was enough!!!!

Bryce Forum Coordinator....

Vision is the Art of seeing things invisible...


erosiaart ( ) posted Sat, 19 February 2005 at 1:37 AM

let's hope you get back onto the loo pot tmrow without any hassles! And back on track healthwise too! Welcome back!


orbital ( ) posted Sat, 19 February 2005 at 3:17 AM

Thats great! Now take it easy.

http://joevinton.blogspot.com/


TheBryster ( ) posted Sat, 19 February 2005 at 8:43 AM
Forum Moderator

Woops! Careful guys! I think Zhann is about to lock this thread for talking about torture....!

Available on Amazon for the Kindle E-Reader

All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster


And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...


Quest ( ) posted Sat, 19 February 2005 at 9:20 AM

LOL...Just goes to show that artists have very vivid imaginations. Now if we can incorporate this topic into a Brycer based image, we just might hit the Hot 20. ;)


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