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Subject: i am embarrassed..but..


erosiaart ( ) posted Mon, 04 October 2010 at 12:10 PM · edited Thu, 19 September 2024 at 8:29 AM

Attached Link: http://www.renderosity.com/mod/gallery/index.php?image_id=2117576

 I need your critics! I just uploaded an image in the 2d section..atmosphere/mood. .. *haiku*..  Can you please, please critic it.. really hard?? be mean, be tough..the worse i'll do to you is sulk, throw a pillow at you and refuse tot alk to you for a few days.. oh..and NOT share my chocolate with you for a day or so.. 

btw..as to the categories as to where it fits.. i have no idea where to put it..i did an eeny minney mo..  - sorry..mods..if my url is wrong..can you please correct it? 

cheers.. 
-rosie


airflamesred ( ) posted Mon, 04 October 2010 at 2:38 PM

There's nothing to criticize Rosie. Its a well constucted/composed image. I don't know what the thing is in the bottom right but certainly no need for embarrasment.
I'v seen straight V4s in the 3d modelling gallery so no need to worry too much about where you placed it.


AnnieD ( ) posted Mon, 04 October 2010 at 3:56 PM

I really like it rosie...looks like a little dolphin in the lower right corner..nice.
Like the haiku poem too..

:thumbupboth:

 

“For those who believe, no proof is necessary. For those who don't believe, no proof is possible.”

[Stuart Chase]


bobbystahr ( ) posted Mon, 04 October 2010 at 4:14 PM

l'm with AnnieD but.... the Haiku is 4 syllables short although captures the atmosphere quite well.. ...

 

Once in a while I look around,
I see a sound
and try to write it down
Sometimes they come out very soft
Tinkling light sound
The Sun comes up again



 

 

 

 

 


DawnStar ( ) posted Mon, 04 October 2010 at 4:19 PM

I don't usually critique but...

Haiku , to me, is breaking down a thought , feeling, or event into it's simplest form. I liked your poem. And the picture is perfect for it, except for the blue dolphin thing in the corner. That complicated the page and took my eye off the purity of the main image and  your words.

Hope this helps. :>)

No chocolate for days and days, huh? 


rstar ( ) posted Mon, 04 October 2010 at 4:27 PM

I see absolutely no reason for you to feel embarrassment, it's a wonderful picture!
I wish I had thought of doing something like it!


tom271 ( ) posted Mon, 04 October 2010 at 5:06 PM

It is very well done....   Rosie



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Analog-X64 ( ) posted Mon, 04 October 2010 at 5:24 PM

If you want an opinion.  I would lose the dolphin thing on the bottom right.

And I would darken the bird so its just plain black.  I can see details in the bird, which clashes with the time of the day the photo would have been taken.


erosiaart ( ) posted Mon, 04 October 2010 at 8:42 PM

Oh wow.. gmorning..  lovely post to wake up to!  thank you everyone!

.er.. lol.. lots of chocolate in a jar near my computer.. mars, cadbury, marshmallows.. you name it..anyone wants one.. reach out and help yourself to many... the liquer ones are in the fridge..sorry..it gets above 36 deg here.. 

I've removed the dolphin..that is my signature.. but well.. guess it showed up too clear out there..  ought to have made it tinier and fainter. 

airflamered..really?? they put V4 in the model section?? that's a hoot! 

bobbystarh, dawnstar.. yup.. i know about the syllables.. that's why i claim to be a terrible poet!
:-p I'll sit and work on it though..later down today.. 

analog..got what you saying.. yup..i'll make it darker... 

thanks a gazillion all of you. hugs...


erosiaart ( ) posted Mon, 04 October 2010 at 10:50 PM

 analog.. i've made it darker.. 
cheers and thanks! and hugs..


TheBryster ( ) posted Tue, 05 October 2010 at 8:16 AM · edited Tue, 05 October 2010 at 8:17 AM
Forum Moderator

Very nice. Kinda spooky in a way. Is this for Halloween?

Available on Amazon for the Kindle E-Reader

All the Woes of a World by Jonathan Icknield aka The Bryster


And in my final hours - I would cling rather to the tattooed hand of kindness - than the unblemished hand of hate...


erosiaart ( ) posted Tue, 05 October 2010 at 8:26 AM

nopes..not for halloween.. though i know what you mean. I'd have used a witch instead.. and a couple of mean looking laughing pumpkins. :-P or created a strange looking blob.. a redo of Casper.. 

spooky? if you look at it that way..it is..  or else like someone remarked..it's peaceful... 


Analog-X64 ( ) posted Tue, 05 October 2010 at 4:26 PM

I like the revised version, its perfect :)

for a signature what about your named signed in handwriting? would be as effective as anything else.


erosiaart ( ) posted Tue, 05 October 2010 at 9:05 PM

 good idea, analog.. i'll create one! 
cheers


zorzim ( ) posted Wed, 06 October 2010 at 6:08 AM

I've seen only the revised version -  DUnno about the other one, but this is very
effective - agree with Dawnstar, there's a perfect connection between title, image and meaning -
which was yr goal , n'est pas ?

Do MORE !


erosiaart ( ) posted Wed, 06 October 2010 at 6:24 AM

 zorzim.. lol..patience! great art happens in phases!  :biggrin: 


pakled ( ) posted Thu, 07 October 2010 at 11:59 PM

dang...seeing I'm as far from you as one could be and remain on the planet...;) I'm not worried about pillows...;)
It's all good, either version works.

I wish I'd said that.. The Staircase Wit

anahl nathrak uth vas betude doth yel dyenvey..;)


erosiaart ( ) posted Fri, 08 October 2010 at 4:23 AM

packled...hahaha


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