Brits will love this...............

Police Officer in the UK

How do you tell the difference between a British Police Officer, an Australian Police Officer and an American Police Officer?

Answer:
First - Lets pose the following question:

You're on duty by yourself walking on a deserted street late at night.
Suddenly, an armed man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and lunges at you.
You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot, however you have only a split second to react before he reaches you. What do you do?

BRITISH POLICE OFFICER:

Firstly the officer must consider the man's Human Rights.

1. Does the man look poor or oppressed?
2. Is he newly arrived in this country and does not yet understand the law?
3. Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
4. Am I dressed provocatively?
5. Could I run away?
6. Could I possibly swing my gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
7. Should I try and negotiate with him to discuss his wrong doings?
8. Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
9. Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society?
10. Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
11. If I were to grab his knees and hold on, would he still want to stab and kill me?
12. If I raise my gun and he turns and runs away, do I get blamed if he falls over, knocks his head and kills himself? .
13. If I shoot and wound him, and lose the subsequent court case, does he have the opportunity to sue me, cost me my job, my credibility and the loss of my family home?

AUSTRALIAN POLICE OFFICER: BANG!

AMERICAN POLICE OFFICER:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!   'click'....

(Sergeant arrives at scene later and remarks: 'Nice grouping!)

troo...too troo....I'd not want to be any other 'bobby' but the Bobby I am in Blighty.. ...

Sounds kinda like dutch soldiers :P

@TheBryster

Question 1: Bobbies are carrying guns now?

Question 2: What if instead of a knife, the man is armed with a piece of fresh fruit or a pointed stick?

BTW, LOL at your post. Glad you realized the U.S. cop would take time to reload (unless, as my knowledge of firearms is limited, a Glock holds 12 rounds?).

And you overlook the fact that American Police never work at night on foot or without a partner.

:b_grin:

Shoot first ask questions later, if its late at night, in america if its late at night and you're prowling the streets you're probably some sort of criminal, well in the big cities. LOL

Damn good thing I'm in Canada then...I generally get active 'round sundown...well that's when I go out to howl on my guitar somewhere or other...guess that's kinda anti establishment and does indeed make me a target for the 'powers that be' . .. ...

Thankfully, British Bobbies do not carry guns as a matter of course. However, they do get to carry machine guns in high risk areas like the Houses of Parliament or airports. Another not so well known fact is that in most areas in the UK there is usually a patrol car with an amoury in a locked container. They can only open the box if permission is granted by a senior officer.

Oh and ALL Bobbies have black belts in Veg-fu......

This might sound all cosy and very British, don't-you-know, but with reference to the recent riots and their origins, if you wave a gun around in public you will get shot. We'll ask if it was a replica later.......................

chris.. .. health and safety has gone mad.. :-p 

i didn't know about the veg fu?? i have to ask them that...