ok I have the impression this was covered in a tutorial, but now I cannot remember it. 

the kid is lying on the bed, is there someway to make it appear to sink beneath his weight?

thanks,

drawn

Using a magnet on the bed might work. First, check to see if the top of the bed has enough polygons. Display>Document style> texture shaded. If you see a bunch of squares (or triangles) on the top of the bed, a magnet will work. You can change the display style back to texture shaded once you've checked.

make sure the bed is selected and then create a magnet. Adjust the location and size of the magnet zone so it roughly follows the shape of Ben and then move the magnet up or down to make the dent.

If the bed doesn't have enough polys to make the dent, you'll need to subdivide it (on the properties tab) and use a morph brush to make the dent. I think I remember you've used the morph brush before, but if you need instructions, ask.

I thot I remember how to use magnet, I got one in place and move it up and down but it just sinks into bed and doesn't make depressed area? I need instructions please.

drawn

You won't need much deformation on a bed, the mattress is firm and supports weight well.  

I found I have that bed and while the covers of it are nice high poly, the mattress is only 1 polygon so it's not going to bend when you use a magnet. you can still dent the bed a little, just not much. Ben's a light kid though. Unless it's a waterbed, he isn't going to sink much

1 make sure the magnet and all parts are set to the bed. If you look at the hierarchy pallet, it will look like it's parented to the bed.

Next scale the mag zone to fit around Ben. I set the display of mine to wire frame so you can see it easier in my shots

Move the mag down until you have the blankets pressed down

Even though in this one, the mag zone looks like it's big enough to cover Ben the dent in the covers isn't. And you can see the mattress (i made it purple for higher visibility) not sinking too.

A little more adjustment on both the mag and mag zone and a little movement on Ben's arms because they were lower than the body and we have him sinking in. This is as low as I can go because of the mattress showing through the blankets if I go any further. But even a subtle sink will help with it looking more real.

if I can mimic your steps, and I can, that will do the job, thanks, Red.