Hello. I'm Renderosibee. Welcome to Celebrity Secrets, the thread where we go behind the scenes and find out the truth about the biggest names in Poser. In today's thread we're going to go back to the very beginning, the earliest days of Poser. Our subject is the Poser 1 Man. Who is he, what makes him tick, and where is he now? Join me as I answer these questions and many others.

Born Julian Hector Pozarri, P1 Man grew up in the seediest hard drive of Meshville. He was a poor student and an unruly child. He was arrested at the age of eight for possession of illegal textures and spent several years in a juvenile detention center. This would be only the first of a long string of arrests for the future P1 Man. Despite his legal troubles, Julian became a minor star in the video game business, although his involvment in the Jurassic Pac-Man debacle nearly destroyed him. Broke, alcoholic, wanted by the law, it seemed as if Julian was finished. Then came Poser 1.

Julian was a natural and soon Poser 1 become a resounding success. His face was on the cover of every newspaper and magazine on the planet. Unfortunately, Julian was ill-prepared for such stardom. His alcoholism grew worse, and combined with a growing obsession with gambling, P1 Man was soon once again in dire straits. But the worst was yet to come. Poser 2 was a great advance over Poser 1, and the P2 characters rendered their predecessors obsolete. Julian was soon consumed by rage, despair, and jealousy. Screaming "I'm ugly and I don't even have any friggin' clothes!", P1 Man attempted to murder the new figures. He failed, but escaped the authorities and became a fugitive.

For seven long months the police searched for P1 Man without success. Then, on an August morning in Colorado, a waitress in a remote truckstop recognized him and contacted the authorites. Although he escaped once again, P1 Man had had enough of running. From the law, from his past, from himself. In desperation, he attempted to delete himself. In an amazing twist of fate, Windows chose that exact moment to crash and the P1 Man survived and was captured.

Now serving the eighth year a twenty year sentence for multiple counts of attempted murder, P1 Man has undergone a metamorphosis. Clean, sober, and full of remorse, he has turned to the Lord, Odin, and been reborn. He has also taken up painting, and his prison folder is covered with paintings of Thor. A model prisoner, P1 Man now waits to finish paying his debt to society and return home, where he hopes to become a youth counselor so that he can share his lessons with other young figures and hopefully spare them from the pain he has suffered. And maybe get some sympathetic soul to model him some clothes. We wish him the best. Thank you for joining me. Be here next week for more Celebrity Secrets. Goodnight.

HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHH!!!!! Drama. Just what this Forum needs MO DRAMA!!! He He He HE...

giggling This is going to be an interesting series! More please!

LOL

Hehe. I can't wait for the next episode. :D

MORE MORE MORE!

{my family is staring at me for my burst of laughter and I know it's one of those things they will never understand...}

Poor P1 man. Can't he get time off for good behavior? I hate it when the hero ends up in jail. Even in Joshua Tree the hero ends up free - sort of.

LOl great little series ya got going there with the renderosibee :)

Thanks, everyone. I'm going to try to do at least one Renderosibee piece each week. Hopefully they won't all be such a rush job...