Performance anxiety by Margana

Photography • Macro • posted on Sep 19, 2005

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Description

WARNING!!!Tons of self-indulgent babble ahead!!!!You have been warned!!!LOL!
Hi everyone!Okay.I bet you're wondering why I gave my pic such a weird name.Okay maybe not,lol.But I'm going to tell you anyway! Some of you may have noticed I haven't been around very much lately.And there is a very good reason for it.I got an attack of 'performance anxiety'.You know what that is.It's when you scare the heck out of yourself for no good reason and then you get stuck because you're afraid to fail. Well,I've been taking tons and tons of pics and working them to death in photoshop,and just when it looks like I have something decent to upload...I chicken out!I have found something wrong with every single one.Why?Because I'm a perfectionist.And (LOL!) it STINKS to be a perfectionist when you don't nearly have the skills to achieve what you want!I can't afford to be a perfectionist!Sigh. Well today I decided to bite the bullet and stick one out there because if I don't I'm never going to do it! Okay so now about my pic...This little guy was just waiting for me this morning.He hung out next to my front door almost as if he wanted to have his pic taken!And even though he didn't move for what seemed like hours,don't you know I still had trouble getting a decent clear shot?I think my eyes are going,lol.But he was sooooo cute!All I had to do was cluck my tongue and he looked right at me!And he was VERY patient with my amateurish efforts.I must have at least twenty-something shots of his gross looking chest-thingy that are super sharp but with his head all a blur!I practically gave him a mammogram!LOL!...Sigh.I can only imagine how much better this would have been if I knew what I was doing!!!!! Oh my.If this isn't my longest bit of babbling yet!LOL.Ooops.Well,if you made it this far,thank you for reading all this nonsense.I want you to know that in spite of my 'performance anxiety' I still REALLY DO want to know what you truly think about my pic...Honestly.I swear.Really.I do.Lol. Have a great week all.Oooh now I can get back to looking at all your wonderful stuff without feeling guilty.YAY! See ya!MmmmmmmmWAH!((g)) Marlene

Comments (55)

hasexx

2:32PM | Tue, 20 September 2005

Cooooool shot :-) love it

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Cosme..D..Churruca

2:56PM | Tue, 20 September 2005

Extraordinary !

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jcv2

4:00PM | Tue, 20 September 2005

Wow, perfectionism has some nice perfect result as utter consequence so THAT works out very well! It's gorgoues and you succeeded very well! Pity to see it cost you so much efforts and energy BUT that makes this one special out of special! Perfect work, Marlene, perfect!

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watapki66

10:34PM | Tue, 20 September 2005

Wow a wonderful capture! Great personality shows through what more could you achieve than that. I know how you feel, a daunting task to keep experimenting with all the wonderful artists watching, I have more than a few that I feel are not worthy for all to see. Great Work Marlene!

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oscilis

9:29AM | Wed, 21 September 2005

Mammagram! Ha, ha, ha. Wonderful photograph. You have a smashing gallery.

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Zacko

10:11AM | Wed, 21 September 2005

OH MY GOD!!! This is the coolest looking bug-shot i have ever seen!!!! WOOOOOW!!! Its fantastic Marlene!!! AMAZING!!! Please...dont get me started on performance anxiety...know all about that....far to well. This goes straight to my Favs for sure. Keep em coming, youre really getting better and better with each upload. Have a fabolous day. #:O)

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sossy

12:42PM | Wed, 21 September 2005

fantastic capture! outstanding lighted and the expression the insect is giving aways is gorgeous! I also be a perfectionist but I learned to take it with humor if something isn't working and I'm not afraid to fall! only a minute... than it is over! LOL

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Onslow

4:53PM | Wed, 21 September 2005

What a strange looking creature. Excellent job done - you have captured the essence of the look and essential qualities of the bug. Insects are never easy to photograph and remember you only get to see the ones we show you - all the others are in the bin :D I think we all feel as you have done sometimes.

tvernuccio

10:39PM | Wed, 21 September 2005

my eyes started filling up with tears as i was reading. i feel exactly the same way, marlene. i used to feel like i was gonna vomit before i uploaded. and then i'd feel terrible anxiety and nausea when i finally did. I'm exactly the same about being a perfectionist. when i look at my images, all i see are my flaws. now that i'm actually printing my work and letting people see my images on our homepage, OMG, i'm scared as hell!!! Anyway, enough about me...just wanted you to know you're not alone. Put up your images, Marlene. All you can do is get better! This image is OUTSTANDING, girl!!! Compo and lighting are magnificent, and so is your presentation!!! You show so much detail, and i LOVE that!!! Anyway, my English teacher once told me not to worry about writing crappy poetry. she said the only way i'll ever write anything outstanding is to write the crappy stuff first. you just get better and better. Have faith and believe in yourself! You're a FABULOUS photographer, Marlene, and an incredible artist. Those aren't just words. i MEAN them. Love ya lots!!!! Hugggssssss!!!

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Lledeline

11:54AM | Thu, 22 September 2005

Great macro.

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Richardphotos

8:52PM | Thu, 22 September 2005

this is an awesome macro of one of my favorite insects. they generally have no fear of people as long as you do not scarethem.do not worry , because this fine work and I would be proud of

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DarkestAngel

2:18PM | Fri, 23 September 2005

Marlene...I think it's all been said above :-) and all I can do is endorse the good comments received...anxiety over I hope?

camera2

9:36PM | Fri, 23 September 2005

Dear Marlene, I know what you mean. I used to do calendars on 'fishing flies' and each year I had to do better than the previous. Even here at RR I find I am uploading less only because I am on the hunt for the one picture that is going to triumph the last and lets not forget I have three galleries. So I fully understand. However, the image of a praying mantis and the title is most appropriate since the female devours the male after performing a sexual act. Talk of "Performance anxiety". Have a great weekend.

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marybelgium

6:53AM | Sat, 24 September 2005

absolutely fantastic !!! BRAVO excellent photography !!!

lelepado

4:09AM | Mon, 26 September 2005

Absolutly incredible!!! I've another one in my gallery but is far from this one a milion light years!!!! Fantastic ... :o)))

Raven_427

6:49AM | Mon, 26 September 2005

There's nothing wrong with trying to be a perfectionist. Not at all if it leads to great images such as this. Ok, sometimes it stinks .. but as you know, i feel this is the only way to improve. The other option is to stay where you are. Not bad .. but is that really what you want from yourself? So i can only encourage you to stay looking for this little flaws in your work .. finally your images are getting better and better. And - as tvernuccio already stated - you're not the only one. Some people even deleted their whole gallery for this reason. :-)

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Niutek

7:52AM | Mon, 26 September 2005

A beautiful shot, Marlene - cute, funy and well lit :)) As for your ramblings - be a perfectionist, if you must (!) but try to remember we don't view your work as 'critically' as you! :)) hugs

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odie

9:37AM | Mon, 26 September 2005

I would say that everyone goes through what you have just decribed. I thought we were all here to HELP each other, so just load em up!! This is very nice, by the way... :0)

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Akinom

1:24AM | Wed, 12 October 2005

Couldn't have said it better than Niu... that's what I thought! :o)

UweMattern

4:07PM | Wed, 12 October 2005

For me there is nothing wrong to search for perfection! This Mantis is very good capured, love the composition and her pose, you have found just the right moment. Professional nature photographs are publishing only less than 1% of there photos.... But a Mantis is not cute, in fact they eat there sexual partners... Top Work! ~Uwe

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LillianaSapphire

2:28AM | Tue, 20 December 2005

I know what you mean about anxiety with images. my gallery seems to be getting worse and worse. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm glad you chose to bite the buttlet because you photo is most excellent.

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