BIO
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I have fluctuated between writing things about my state of mind and writing about my life as we know it. Most of the time I'd just delete everything and leave it all blank. I've decided to just ramble on from time to time and let the crap stay. Kind of a log file, just as hard to understand, and just as worthless to most...
May 08 2009: Posted an issue I feel strongly about. Alienate a lot of people. Need to talk to someone. Tried talking to friends but we are all dealing with the same s#it - the loss of a friend. Tried here on Renderosity. Nobody will talk.
May 14 2009: Took some time off to let go of some anger. Hope to post again. I really want to delete everything. Been a member since 2003 so I know how it works. I am just getting so tired of everything.
May 18 2009: It's so desperately sad that my life has come to this. I had hoped there'd be something better for me. I used to think I had something to say. But my private ideologies gave me away. I tried to keep my mouth shut but it's always the same over and over and over again.Today I got it wrong again but it's not surprise. Once more heaven has forgotten me. So everybody clap your hands together and close your eyes, as I watch my world collapse. Don't waste your sympathy on me because I made this mess. My mistakes happen with so much success but I drag you all down into my sorry mess. I said I was sorry but it's always the same over and over and over again. I have been doomed from the first time I tried to find something to say I kept hidden inside. It would be much better if I just smiled and lied. ...
June 5, 2009: Things are not good. I know I should blog. No body reads this. Most web users skim at best. So I am safe in leaving behind scraps of mental illness in my wake. Things are NOT good..
July 10, 2009: It's all turned the s#it - i'ts ALL s#it.
November 25, 2015: I am amazed that I still breath. Whenever I begin to feel as if I have no Hope, I hear a whisper in my ear that reminds me I AM STRONG.
...at least for one more day.
Comments (6)
seothan
This image is so expressive of pain.How we deal with it and the self expression of attempting to somehow relieve/block or medicate the victimization that continualy haunts us.It is no wonder before we gather our tools to cope, the thought of exsisting rather than being nothing and empty is crucial. The black/white/grays are perfect for this art.The symbolic background of dark and light is indicitive of the duality of the personality and the battle to survive.Exsistence is a matter of perception isn't it.You have prepared in words and artisticlly a deep truthful reality.Exceptional Yomah.
gunsan
We have quite a lot in common, I mean that with long sleeves.But Yo...things can change. Nowadays I greet every day in the morning with love in my heart, and gratefullness....just to be alive in this wonderful thing we call the world.
A_
i hope someday you can find other proof... but this is a really powerful and intesne work of art. you are so talented and so good in portraying your emotions.
Lashia
This is amazing work, I always love them! I feel the same, about my scars, but I have learnt to over come the want for the pain, and I hope you will, too. There isnt always a brighter side, but I hope you will find it.
ARTWITHIN
Excellent work! You express yourself well without going outside the bounds of taste, and that has more impact than you can imagine. Question: Do you feel alive when you express your caring for others, when you are giving to others? It would appear so from your previous "portraits".
Kimberly.3D
Very loudly this says there is a great pain that you are covering up...It is not fair that some of us have to have it. Some times when we feel like dying something does make us find the pain to know we are not dead yet. It is understandable. Sometimes doing that just becomes a habit. Be careful not to cut again...try to find some help for cutting. The artwork is crazy good!