Having been born and raised in a tent just outside Leavesden Mental Asylum where both my parents were inmates, I always knew I was special. Even when I was at school I stood out from the crowd, some said it was because I was wearing a potato sack and they all had uniforms but I say it was personality that seperated me from the pack.
After leaving school I struggled to make a living for a while until a chance encounter with a street walker in Watford High Street. After that I made my fortune from call girls paying me not to sleep with them.Â
Despite my new found wealth I was still very lonely until one day I met a blind, deaf, mute woman with no sense of smell and had two very ugly children with her. Alas her sense of smell returned and once again I found myself alone. So if you're very ugly and have no self respect, give me a call. I'll let you buy me dinner.
Some of the above might be slightly misleading or entirely untrue.Â
I was raised in Leavesden, just outside Watford England. That much was true. They filmed Goldeneye at Leavesden Studios actually. Fascinating huh? It was a Rolls Royce aeroplane engine plant when I lived there. The bit about the two children was true, maybe not the ugly part but when you look at their parents...what hope did they have?
These days above all I write comic fantasies and spoofs of the whole ridiculous fantasy genre. You can find my feeble scribblings at futilefantasycreations.co.uk along with some textures for use with Poser or Daz.  There's a real terrible film we made on there too. Go see!
My Stats
D.O.B: 1st March 1971.
Hair: A distant memory.
Gender: Ugly man.
That's it. I've said too much.
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Comments (13)
ShariaAsen
Yeah, I would have given you a 6, but I'll have to give you just a 5 since you used such a corny title. :P Nice render! :)
DarqIce
I love the scene hon ! You did a great job on the lighting and the expressions are great :P
Dragonluna1
LOLz!!! Excellent scene, even if the title is corny!!
lethalliam
Fantastic work. :)
cookie-21
i love it!!!!!!!
Bossie_Boots
Lol @ corny title fantastic image and lighting superb work hugs lou x
Antonio57
Magnifique composition et joli rendu!!!!!!!Les couleurs sont très bien!!!!
Cimaira
Outstanding lighting, poses and expressions!! fantastic image as usual, well minus that corny title, lol.. and of course the story line is too funny, I love it.
Soulpainter
OK: ON the site of the image: EXCELLENT WORK. Lighting, posing, expressions, background, all of it is awesome the words below now that just cracked me the heck up! Excellent work all the way around!
ontar1
Great poses and expressions, excellent work!!!!
Mousson
Wowwww! Faboulous! Wonderful perspective and light! Great job!
bigmelommoo
Great render.
kasalin
Masterful character work! You did a real creative job on this. Well done! 5*